^^^
I read Franklins post on my phone last night and couldve sworn it was in chinese. Makes a little more sense now, but still...
^^^
I read Franklins post on my phone last night and couldve sworn it was in chinese. Makes a little more sense now, but still...
Originally Posted by Archie Moses
Never forget.
Sign Scotty Hopson #powercircle
I'm quite enjoying these little strolls down mammary lane.
"7,000 plus post in less than 3 years. Don't you have anything better to do? You probably live with your mommy and play with your dingle berry because you can't get a girl to go out with, let alone to lay. Go jerk off some more, dork." -- Deep Thoughts, by Eenie-Meenie
"My wife and kids would probably disagree with everything you said, except the last part." -- Deep Response, by E.J. Wells
How did this bump not get more attention? This is one of the best GD threads of the past year.
Sign Scotty Hopson #powercircle
Whenever I'm having a bad day, thinking about this thread always makes me feel better. Thanks, ArchiMo
Damn, I don't really have any crazy or terribly interesting stories. I have some stories that just plain sucked though, if this thread is about feeling better about yourself. Strangely, after thinking of these, most of them involve the bathroom in some sort...
When I was probably 15, I went tube fishing with my step dad and step brother, and those of you that have ever tube fished know that getting in and out of the water takes a lot of time. So I'm out on the water, and the wind picks up. Suddenly, I have to pee really bad and am in waders. I struggle to try to get back to shore, without jostling myself too much. Needless to say, I ran out of time and peed my pants. The piss had nowhere to go because I was in waders (water tight), so I sat in my own piss for about 3 more hours out on the lake, pretending as if nothing happened. I smelled like piss when I took the waders off and had to use the campfire to dry myself off, and then force everybody to smell piss for the rest of the night in the tent. That was awkward.
When I was 17 I took the ACTs. Years prior I took a lot of anti-biotics to help control my awkward teenage acne, which to this day still cause me problems. Needless to say, my stomach is very fragile and I have a long list of foods I can't eat without almost ****ting myself shortly afterward. So, there I am, taking the ACTs. I have the most wicked of wicked stomache-aches, and during the break between test sections I take the biggest wicked, loud dump ever amongst a group of probably 10-15 other guys using the bathroom or filing in and out. I show up to the next segment of the test about 15 minutes late and fail miserably.
When I was 18, I went with my then girlfriend and her family to a pretty sweet condo in the southern california desert. I had never met them before and they were both pretty rich/pompous/proper people. We sat down to watch a movie, and the surround sound was turned up really loud. Once the movie audio started playing (or music during the studio credits) it blared out really loud sound and her dad about jumped out of his chair from being startled by the loud noise. I laughed really hard, and laughed for a long time, completely interrupting the movie for about the next 10 minutes. It made me laugh so much, I had to poo. So I went to the bathroom, sat on the toilet and laughed to myself for about another 20 minutes, just recollecting about how funny it was to see this rich old guy get scared ****less. It was awkward trying to explain what was going on in the bathroom for that long, as I sort of lost track of time and I'm sure they could hear me roaring with laughter from the other side of the bathroom door. The girl wound up being a 100% crazy bitch, though, so I'm glad I at least got some enjoyment out of that utter waste of time.
When I was probably 22, I was at a gym shooting hoops by myself. Getting confident and stuff, I run down the floor, pull up for a 15 foot jumper and for some reason my feet never corrected themselves in order to land safely, so I landed right on the side of my ankle and faceplanted straight into the floor. A couple dudes were at the door watching and talking amongst another, so I looked like a total dumbass.. injuring myself when nobody else is even on the court. Then I have to painfully act as if everything is all good and run back down the floor on a badly sprained ankle.
There, feel better about yourselves and stuff!
This thread needed a bump.
I hate you Dal. But love your stalking.
........................................................................................................................ ...
ficksedI h8 u Dal. But luv ur stalking.
On my way to work, I stopped to get gas, I forgot my wallet at home but luckily there was a $20 in the cupholder. I went in and prepaid, my mind started wandering thinking about hot babes or something and I got in the car without filling my car with gas and drove off. I was about 5 miles away before I realized I was stilll out of gas and realized what I had done.
I posted in a Ute thread and got under the skin of Yewt fanz.
The end.
Archie, when I saw this thread title I thought Post Moronic meant "After Moroni" and you wanted people to discuss things that happened after Moroni appeared to Joseph Smith
Honestly, that's what I thought. OK, that should make you feel better.
:-)
I PayPal'ed UGLI $50.
Here's one.....
I started "baking" something in the top half of a double oven a couple hours ago. Problem is, I had turned on the bottom half instead and I just checked and the thing is not cooked at all. I need to get married ASAP. I don't even know how to work an oven properly. I'm an embarrassment to humanity.
By two wings we are lifted above Earthly things - purity and simplicity.
Make up time. Double the temp and it'll cook in half the time!
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