Finances and marriage........

[bigb]

We have one account for everyday needs, and another for our long term savings. About a week before we got married, we closed her account and put it all into one. Now, she doesn't work, so she wouldn't have her own account anyway. We don't really "budget" but our system works for us. Neither of us spend a ton of money. We make no big purchases without discussing it. I check the balance regularly online and let her know where we are. We hide NOTHING from each other financially (or otherwise for that matter). I tell her when I get cash bonuses or exactly how much I get when I take all the scrap wire into the recycling plant. She knows the account number and password to the accounts. Accountability, honesty, and openness is our key.

[PKM]

Right on. That's exactly the environment I would want to foster. I'm not expecting to marry the illegitimate bassturd daughter of Warren Buffet or something that understands the perfect use for every dollar. I remember my dad clamping down on my mother's spending to a very austere degree at times growing up for no reason really and the negative impact it had on her attitude at times so that's definitely something that's ingrained in my memory and would ever prevent me from ever being really overprotective with money. It's just money afterall. It's not ultimately that important. You don't need to guard every dollar like it's The Holy Grail.

Right. Mine isn't about penny-pinching .. I'm actually quite loose with money. Very, actually.

I just HATE waste, detest it. Splurge often works great. Value, for me ..

just don't buy stupid **** and end up not using it or throwing it away .. if you'll use it, buy it. If it will last longer, make you feel better, pay more ...............

[BigWilly087]

Both my wife and I work for now, and we just pool everything into one joint account. I think it's easier to do if you get married relatively young before either party has substantial assets. We keep a healthy reserve in checking, with the rest invested to our Roth IRAs or 401ks. She is really good with money so I don't worry too much, that's not to say I don't audit our online banking from time to time. We don't have a set rule about talking before spending, but as a general rule of thumb we probably at least let the other person know our intention of spending more than a hundred or so on a unexpected item.

Sent from my Nexus 10 using Tapatalk HD

[PKM]

Did u ask her before buying your Nexus? (or did you come in under the threshold because you signed a multi?)

[bluenote]

We have a joint checking and savings account for all of the bills, mortgage payment, purchases (groceries, car,repairs), trips together, dinners together, etc. and then we each have a separate checking account which we call "fun money". Each month a % from our paycheck is deposited into this checking account and we can spend it which ever way we please without running it by the other. This system has worked great for us as we both want to be involved in our finances, but want a little freedom as well. The key is determining the appropriate amount of fun money in relation to bills and savings.

[BigWilly087]

Did u ask her before buying your Nexus? (or did you come in under the threshold because you signed a multi?)

Birthday present

[GoJazz]

I run a business and pay myself from that business. My wife has our personal bank accounts. I deposit the money from the business into that account from which she pays bills and buys whatever she wants. It works because any large purchases she has to come to me or if our monthly cash runs out or is running low she has to come to me for more cash at which time we talk about it.

[Hartsock]

My wife is impossiby bad with money, like when we first got married I would get paid on friday morning and would be out of money by the time I got home from work friday night. So now we have one account, I keep the card, she gets cash when she needs it. I pay the bills, take care of saving, make the budget, and have learned to tell her no. We are much better off now.

My In-Laws have/had a crazy situation. My FIL is a construction guy so he makes like $30 bucks and hour working 60 hour weeks, not great money, but enough to be well enough off. They are so in debt, so behind on bills, so broke that it blows my mind. They live rent free, in her parents old house, only have 1 kid at home, and are still struggling really bad. My MIL gets an allowance from her mom, like a big allowance of probably 5k a month and still blows through that and her husbands check with ease. There are huge piles of clothes that lay around the house with all the tags still on them, she just buys them to buy them. My FIL will not even have lunch money often times because his wife has blown through the check the day the get it. Well my MIL died recently, and my FIL told me that he is finding out about credit cards he didnt know existed that are maxed out, finding thousands of dollars in cash buried in piles of clothes, finding thousands of dollars in uncashed checks from months and years ago. He told me this is the first time he has had over $100 in savings in 15 years. He is 45 years old. It sickens me.

[PKM]

My wife is impossiby bad with money, like when we first got married I would get paid on friday morning and would be out of money by the time I got home from work friday night. So now we have one account, I keep the card, she gets cash when she needs it. I pay the bills, take care of saving, make the budget, and have learned to tell her no. We are much better off now.

My In-Laws have/had a crazy situation. My FIL is a construction guy so he makes like $30 bucks and hour working 60 hour weeks, not great money, but enough to be well enough off. They are so in debt, so behind on bills, so broke that it blows my mind. They live rent free, in her parents old house, only have 1 kid at home, and are still struggling really bad. My MIL gets an allowance from her mom, like a big allowance of probably 5k a month and still blows through that and her husbands check with ease. There are huge piles of clothes that lay around the house with all the tags still on them, she just buys them to buy them. My FIL will not even have lunch money often times because his wife has blown through the check the day the get it. Well my MIL died recently, and my FIL told me that he is finding out about credit cards he didnt know existed that are maxed out, finding thousands of dollars in cash buried in piles of clothes, finding thousands of dollars in uncashed checks from months and years ago. He told me this is the first time he has had over $100 in savings in 15 years. He is 45 years old. It sickens me.

Sheesh .. it's easy enough to struggle and be broke to add being a complete dumbhead to the equation.

[Hartsock]

Sheesh .. it's easy enough to struggle and be broke to add being a complete dumbhead to the equation.

He will probably find enough money hidden around their bedroom and in secret bank accounts to pay off the credit card debt he didnt know he had ..... Now to just take care of all the debt he did know about.

[CONAN]

One account. We both can manage the finances. She did it early on and it has shifted to me. Works well. Hats off to those of you with moneydumb spouses. Don't know that I could handle that.

[Hartsock]

I had to explain to my wife that if you go to one store and spend $50 its only $50, but if you go to 8 stores and spend $50 at each place that is $400. It was like a light turned on in her head. She still ditzilly spends money without thinking about it, but she has gotten better.

[candrew]

I had to explain to my wife that if you go to one store and spend $50 its only $50, but if you go to 8 stores and spend $50 at each place that is $400. It was like a light turned on in her head. She still ditzilly spends money without thinking about it, but she has gotten better.

LOL - I have a similar problem with my wife. My wife doesn't spend a lot of money on herself; but she thinks as long as she is buying something "for the family" or "for the house" then she can go through our money like **** through a goose. I had to explain to her that $500 is $500 no matter if it's for her, the family or if you're ****ing burning it.

[Hartsock]

LOL - I have a similar problem with my wife. My wife doesn't spend a lot of money on herself; but she thinks as long as she is buying something "for the family" or "for the house" then she can go through our money like **** through a goose. I had to explain to her that $500 is $500 no matter if it's for her, the family or if you're ****ing burning it.

You know how much I spent on christmas for her family? And for her little sisters birthday? Almost as much as i spent on my family for christmas and for my own daughters bday. Any protest from me meant I hated her family and we would never have to visit them anymore. Oh well, at least they had a good christmas and her sister got some nice stuff.

[candrew]

OH man I have the same problem. But I hate Christmas shopping so much I've just learned to let it go - my wife does all the Christmas shopping for her family AND for my family; so just I take that as a trade off.