Dennis Lindsey on the Woj pod

Discussion in 'Utah Jazz' started by Jingled, Mar 12, 2019.

  1. Ostertag>Duncan

    Ostertag>Duncan My Members Premium Contributor

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    My parents are that age where you could lose them but still shouldn't. Not sure how I'm going to handle losing my mom especially. It's gonna be rough.
     
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  2. Wes Mantooth

    Wes Mantooth Well-Known Member

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    Yeah, I thought I’d be fine with losing either parent but as I get older, I sense I’ll have a rough time when my mother passes. She’s great. So sweet, amazing cook, heart of gold. Looks great for 71 too.

    I love my dad and have a deeper connection with him. Always have. But as I get older, I see how selfish he is and has always been. It won’t devastate me unless I regret not telling him certain harsh feelings I have for him. If I’m not brutally honest with him and he passes, I could struggle a tiny bit. Not sure. But yeah I blame him in many ways for my brother’s death.
     
    Last edited: Mar 14, 2019
  3. Douchebag K

    Douchebag K Well-Known Member

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    that's some heavy stuff dude .. my dad's 81 but in great health and i wonder whether i should talk to him about certain things like that or not ..
     
  4. Stoked

    Stoked Well-Known Member Contributor 2018 Award Winner

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    My mom died of cancer at 60 and my Dad went into the hospital on the 1 year anniversary of her funeral and never came out.

    2011 and 2012. ****ing sucks.
     
  5. Handlogten's Heros

    Handlogten's Heros Well-Known Member

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    I'm with ya man. Same with my moms... sucks to see good people suffer on their way out... slept in the hospital lobby for a week before she went.

    No matter how strong and independent I became there was still comfort knowing mom was out there if **** happened that you couldn't handle... losing that leaves a hole... I'm sure I'm not the only one that feels that way.

    Everyone call their mom on the way home from work or when you have a moment tonight and tell them how awesome they are.
     
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  6. Wes Mantooth

    Wes Mantooth Well-Known Member

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    Yeah I’m way too good at getting over ****. Death happens. It’s part of life. So I may be fine with it all tbh. But I’m not sure.
     
  7. Handlogten's Heros

    Handlogten's Heros Well-Known Member

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    I have similar issues there... my half brother lit my dad up with stuff from the past recently... not sure if he felt better after but didn't bother pops much... thinks he was just being a little sensitive. I'm not sure what good it would do now to dig up the past. I just try not to do the selfish stuff he does and try not to let it bother me when he's screwing up.
     
  8. Douchebag K

    Douchebag K Well-Known Member

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    Never underestimate the power of denial.....
     
  9. Handlogten's Heros

    Handlogten's Heros Well-Known Member

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    I've got thick skin but certain things will trigger sadness. So you get over it, but you never fully get over it... if that makes sense. There are just things you wish they could be there for. At least that's how it is with her.

    Imma get off the therapy couch now... Let's talk about Dante's lack of progress and 2019 draft prospects.
     
  10. Wes Mantooth

    Wes Mantooth Well-Known Member

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    Yep. It’s sort of why I don’t bring it up. I tore into him once about three and a half years ago and aggressively said, “Get it through your ****ing head. I don’t need you in my life. You don’t bring **** to the table for me.” In the midst of a 5-10 minute *** ripping. Probably tore his heart apart but idgaf. Even still today, jokingly, when we’re together, I say how he was a dick as a dad.

    That said, he’s a great man. I’d guess he’ll have over 1,000 people at his service when the time comes as I know he’s touched so many lives in education. Possibly 2,000 but that number seems crazy to me. Hundreds upon hundreds many of whom he still stays in touch with. I honestly dread the service because I feel like I’d be expected to speak and I don’t have the same perspective on him as those who he taught or coached. I respect him. He’s a great man and an even better human being. But I would feel the need to say my thoughts on him as I see him and it would just come across as bitter and ****ed up.
     
  11. fishonjazz

    fishonjazz Well-Known Member Contributor 2018 Award Winner

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    Brothers death? Damn, how old was your brother?
    (As always, don't talk about if you don't want to bro)

    Sent from my ONEPLUS A6013 using JazzFanz mobile app
     
  12. fishonjazz

    fishonjazz Well-Known Member Contributor 2018 Award Winner

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    Good idea. I don't call my folks enough. I will take your advice.

    Sent from my ONEPLUS A6013 using JazzFanz mobile app
     
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  13. Wes Mantooth

    Wes Mantooth Well-Known Member

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    Yeah I mean sort of. My brother committed suicide 8.5 years ago. I almost never cried and it never really bothered me much. He too was an amazing man (had about 800 people at his service I’d guess) but he was an educator and there was no way I was going to cry in front of kids and martyr him. He too was selfish and self-involved and volatile and he chose to do something stupid. It wouldn’t have been right to cry in front of kids imo. And like I said, I barely cried anyway. I cor yes it to happen at some point. However, when I think of how amazing of an uncle he’d have been to my kids, it deeply saddens me. But only two or three times have I really pondered that and teared up.
     
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  14. Wes Mantooth

    Wes Mantooth Well-Known Member

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    See below. I’ve mentioned this on here a few times. He was 39 at the time and 4.5 years older than me.
     
  15. Wes Mantooth

    Wes Mantooth Well-Known Member

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    You’d be surprised. I’m just built differently. Seriously. **** happens. My brother hit a perfect storm. He was robbed at gun point in college and thus bought firearms thereafter to be “in control” of his life. He had a ****ed gf in college who lied and told him she had cancer so he wouldn’t break up with her. That went on a few months. Coupled with childhood **** (my dad was cold to him upon returning from Vietnam when he was an infant) and how he was raised, and then add in a girl breaking his heart and some Jack, and the volatility came out. It was not a surprise. And saying it bluntly like that doesn’t mean I don’t and didn’t love him. Those are simply the facts and I know he’d see it the same way. Crying over and feeling pity for such situations is something I never understood. It’d feel disingenuous and selfish to me which is something I don’t get.
     
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  16. Wes Mantooth

    Wes Mantooth Well-Known Member

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    Two things that terrify me though.

    1) Telling my children about this. My two cousins on my dad’s side also tried committing suicide multiple times and I’m torn on when and how to broach the subject when it inevitably comes up.
    2) My deathbed. This terrifies me.
     
  17. Wes Mantooth

    Wes Mantooth Well-Known Member

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    Don’t feel uncomfortable talking to me about this btw. If it bothered me, I wouldn’t bring it up.
     
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  18. Wes Mantooth

    Wes Mantooth Well-Known Member

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    Trying to get my mom to text me that pic of her for you pervs. I’ll post it here.
     
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  19. Wes Mantooth

    Wes Mantooth Well-Known Member

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    upload_2019-3-14_21-0-20.jpeg

    A year ago. At 70.
     
  20. Douchebag K

    Douchebag K Well-Known Member

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    nah not at all dude, it's good to talk I appreciate your honesty. Different people manage their baggage in different ways.
     

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