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If you were Ty Corbin...

Discussion in 'Utah Jazz' started by Zerol, Mar 11, 2011.

  1. Zerol

    Zerol Active Member

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    what would you say to the team? The following are what I would say:

    To Al Jefferson:
    "You are doing a tremendous job on offense and I will keep running the offense through you, but if you don't learn to box out on the defensive end, I am gonna bench you and let the kids play. I am not bluffing......"

    To Paul Millsap:
    "Paul, you are the toughest player on my team and I can see how much you love the game. I know you have been waiting Boozer to get the hell out so that you can prove you are a starter in the league. Well, you have proven it so far but I am gonna need you to come off the bench, because we have NO ONE who can score off the bench. You'll still get a lot of minutes, and you'll be the team captain."

    To Derrick Favors:
    "Go watch the tapes of Dwight Howard and copy what he is doing step by step except, of course, the free throws and the Ts. Get rebounds, blocks and dunks... that's all I ask for! Oh, and hit the weight room at your down time."

    To Raja Bell:
    "Come on man, I played you 45 minutes last game and you can still play? Just rest and give a chance to that kid (point to Hayward). All right then, I am going to play you that many minutes to tire you out until you break."

    To Gordon Hayward:
    "When Bell breaks, you are going to start. At the mean time, I want you to get rid of the first step move you always try to pull off. Let's face it, you suck at that and traveled 9 times out of 10 with that move. Just come off the screen, shoot when you're open, and pass when you're not. Simple basketball."

    To Devin Harris:
    "You've been good so far and keep pushing the tempo. Oh one thing, what happened with your free throw shooting man? I need you to be back at about 83, 84% so that I don't have to put Bell in in late game situation. Help me out here man."

    To CJ Miles:
    "Look, I need you to focus and show me some sort of consistency, man. I can't afford to see you dropping 23 with 4 3s in one game then disappear for several games before resurface again. I know, I know that Russian dude coming in and out of the lineup doesn't help, and trust me, if it's up to me I shut him down for season with Bell, but we don't have enough body and he has seniority. Oh, and you know what, you don't have to shoot 3 everytime! Think going to the basket first and when the defense starts giving you space, shoot!"

    To Andrei Kirilenko:
    "You know, I know that this is your contract year. Can you learn from Boozer and play like him when he was in his contract years? He even managed to play through injuries in those years, so why can't you?"

    To Mehmet Okur:
    "We miss your shooting but now, the most important thing is for you to get healthy so that next season we can trade you... no sorry, my bad, I meant play you."

    To Kyrylo Fesenko:
    "Can you not worry about what to say during interviews and just play ball? Also, go watch the tapes of the Jazz Legend Greg Ostertag. If you can play like him, we are a top 10 team, you know that? What? I am not kidding so stop laughing!"

    To Earl Watson:
    "I know it's tough for you when you have no one to pass the ball to in the second unit, but that doesn't mean you can score yourself either. I will mix and match so that you have players around you to cover your deficiency since I can really use your defense one the ball."

    To Francisco Elson:
    "Just rest. Derrick needs to play. If they are in foul trouble and Al and Paul need a rest, then I will wake you up and you go."

    To Jeremy Evans:
    "Here is a $1,000 McDonald's arch card and I want you to use it up in a month. Meanwhile go lift weight as often as you can. Don't worry about the game yet. Just get fat first then get strong. Then I let you know whose tapes you should watch. I am still struggling between Rodman and Josh Smith."
     
    bigb and Coloradojazzfan like this.
  2. gregbroncs

    gregbroncs Well-Known Member

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    You forgot Price.

    So here goes. Please don't tell anybody that you are not really hurt. We don't want you and it's better for your next contract if you were not sat down in favor of a Bell, Price, Miles and Hayward rotation. How bad are you that those 4 are significantly better even though they hustle half as much?
     
  3. Gyp Rosetti

    Gyp Rosetti Banned

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    To Al Jefferson: "Box out for the rebounds, pass the ball, and get into shape. You still look ****ing soft!"

    To Paul Millsap: "We know you give a damn and work on the court and off. Just be patient."

    To Derrick Favors: "Olowokandi? Kwame? Bowie? Ever heard of 'em? Good. Well, you have great potential too. Now let's see what you can do with it."

    To Raja Bell: "Die."
     
  4. Saint Cy of JFC

    Saint Cy of JFC Well-Known Member

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    To everyone "Stop sucking"
     
  5. DutchJazzer

    DutchJazzer Well-Known Member

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    I would quit

    he aint even coaching
     
  6. tonstermits

    tonstermits Well-Known Member

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    So you would bench Al if he doesn't box out more? This isn't high school basketball. You play your best players.
     
  7. asian_roger

    asian_roger Active Member

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    He stopped coaching because his team looked so pathetic. There was no point. He's going to call them out like the Knicks game, except this is worse. Corbin, like Sloan simply expects his players to perform to their highest level or at least try. When the team doesn't even try the coach can just put his head in his hands. This game insulted Corbin.
     
  8. Chad Feldheimer

    Chad Feldheimer Well-Known Member

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    Hard to coach guys who don't try
     
  9. Gyp Rosetti

    Gyp Rosetti Banned

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    Or maybe he just doesn't know how to coach them up or out of a funk or inspire or intelligently reach his players. The dude's been in over his head from day one.
     
  10. Realjazz

    Realjazz Member

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    First, Corbin needs to get in the official's face, Harris is getting mugged out there. Next he needs to take his foot and break it off in every player's butt and see how they respond. The ones that sulk we need to just ditch.
     
  11. BIGAL

    BIGAL Member

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    This is one of the best threads I have seen on here. Some funny stuff Zerol. Though, I believe we need to keep Kirelinko. My dialogue, "Listen, your a vet and I need you to be smarter on the court. Play more to your strengths by hitting the boards and CUTTING TO THE HOOP! You are very good at moving without the ball when you try. I want 80% of your points to come in the paint, STOP SHOOTING JUMPSHOTS! On the defensive end, just be active! Use those lanky arms to your advantage! Act like you want to be here, or somebody else will."
     
  12. franklin

    franklin Well-Known Member

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    ...then I'd get Masha on the phone, ask for 14 nice suits, 38 ties, and her and AK's travel agent. It's gonna be a long summer.
     
  13. zman1527

    zman1527 Well-Known Member

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    If I were Ty, I would be saying to Ty Corbin "Self, why didn't you take a HC job at some college for awhile? This HC thing is harder than it looks. I sure hope Greg gives me about 5 years to figure it out."
     
  14. VINYLONE

    VINYLONE Bringin' the diversity! Contributor

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    Oh come on. Thats not fair. He just needs the right 1st assistant to tell remind who is on the bench...believe it.
     
  15. reignman40

    reignman40 Active Member

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    I would be happy I tricked this team ran by ****ing morons into giving me a contract before I actually won because if I didn't I would be gone this summer.
     
  16. LogGrad98

    LogGrad98 Well-Known Member Contributor

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    I get a real kick out of everyone ragging on AJ's rebounding. He is pulling down 10 per game and yet everyone complains that he doesn't box out. Seriously? You don't think that any team in the league would love a center that is at 26 ppg, 10 rpg and 2.5 bpg? The one bright spot we have and all people can say is "why can't get box out better so he can get more rebounds than Karl Malone averaged for his career".

    And in defense of Jefferson think how this all must feel to him. He was so happy coming here. It was refreshing to see his humility in the interviews before the season. He just knew he was coming to play with the premiere point guard in the league, and on a team with a very strong winning tradition. Then they started the season pretty strong and got some energizing come from behind wins...then it all falls apart and he is in minny all over again, and it really had nothing to do with him. The seeds of team collapse were sown long before he got here. For him it was bad timing, and I feel for the guy. With how good he has been playing since the AS break I think he of all our players truly deserves accolades much more than criticism.
     
  17. candrew

    candrew Well-Known Member

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    If I was Ty Corbin I'd shave that horrid pencil stache.

    Dude looks like the black Bud Abbott.
     
  18. Gyp Rosetti

    Gyp Rosetti Banned

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    BUMP.

    For all you ****tards who thought he was or could do a good job.
     
  19. franklin

    franklin Well-Known Member

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    It's so awesome when you join the herd and pump popular bull **** for rep points!
     
  20. Gyp Rosetti

    Gyp Rosetti Banned

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    Uh, yeah, that's what I'm doing.
     

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