After a one-year ban for posting “obscene” photos on the board, I’m back.
Thank you. Thank you. I see everyone is pretty excited about this except GayVeganCommunist. He looks kinda bummed.
All I can say to the uptight prude that banned me, to the freak that runs this site, all I can say is that there is nothing obscene about the nude human body, and Jerry Sloan is a beautiful man.
That's right: A Beautiful Man!
Besides, the bushes outside his bedroom window interfered with my camera’s auto-focus feature and many of the pictures were blurry. I can't post any more of the "artistic" (ie, nude) shots or I'll get banned again. But here's a nice one of him once he saw me and put his his pajamas on
You don't want to know what he said he was going to do with that thumb.
Being banned from Jazzfanz was the beginning of a strange and wonderful journey for me. Mostly strange.
I decided to use my time off to meet interesting people and make new friends. No, I wasn’t going to do anything radical, like going to church, joining a sports league or volunteering to serve Thanksgiving meals to bums (Trout), degenerates (you know who – if I say it, I’ll get banned again) and druggies (Viny). No, this was 2009. We had the internet now. I decided to find an internet message board that appealed to my various interests.
I’m a family oriented type of guy. I like kids. I have two of my own. I enjoy sharing my time and talents to offer guidance and direction to youth. I’d actually been missing doing that since I got kicked out of the Boy Scouts. That’s another story entirely, but to avoid 30 PMs asking me what happened, I’ll just explain.
We were working on our health merit badges and I thought a live demonstration using props would be more educational than a dry, boring lecture. So using a banana, a birth control device and a German Shepherd, I demonstrated an important health principle to the boys that was very pertinent to their age range.
Unfortunately, the demonstration startled Adolf.
Apparently the Boy Scouts of America would rather have a bunch of diseased, infected teen-aged boys running around than to have a Scout leader offer a mature, common-sense approach to health.
The Boy Scouts are a petty and vindictive organization. They refused to pay for my medical treatment for injuries suffered in the line of duty. The bite marks on my forearms became infected and my reconstructive ear surgery was incredibly expensive. Way to go, BSA.
Artists Representation
But anyways, I decided to find a new message board. I did some internet research and I found a NAMBLA message board. Yeah, I know it’s a dumb name. Who knows what it means. But Jazzfanzz is a dumb name, too. Everybody knows fans is spelled with an “s”.
"S"
But there seemed to be a great buncha guys on this board. They were very family-oriented and kid friendly. I made a lot of friends; Dan the pediatrician, Bob the elementary school principal, Rick the school bus driver and Mark the Pop Warner football coach.
Some of my new friends.
They did have their idiosyncrasies, though. They didn’t talk about their wives or girlfriends a lot. They’re kinda private that way. But I found it refreshing. No talk about “bitches” and “ho’s”. They were respectful and decent. I liked that. That’s why I accepted an invitation to their picnic. It was held at a weird time, though. I had to take off work a couple hours early to get to the park on time (you know, the one over by that elementary school near State Street).
Unfortunately I had a flat tire on the way over so I was running late. Just as I pulled into the park several squad cars filled with policeman showed up and began fighting with them. I’m not sure if they didn’t get the right permit for the picnic, or what, but because of my restraining order (thanks for nothing Boy Scouts), I decided to make a discreet retreat.
My new friend Tom also decided to make a hasty exit.
(continued below...)
Thank you. Thank you. I see everyone is pretty excited about this except GayVeganCommunist. He looks kinda bummed.
All I can say to the uptight prude that banned me, to the freak that runs this site, all I can say is that there is nothing obscene about the nude human body, and Jerry Sloan is a beautiful man.
That's right: A Beautiful Man!
Besides, the bushes outside his bedroom window interfered with my camera’s auto-focus feature and many of the pictures were blurry. I can't post any more of the "artistic" (ie, nude) shots or I'll get banned again. But here's a nice one of him once he saw me and put his his pajamas on
You don't want to know what he said he was going to do with that thumb.
Being banned from Jazzfanz was the beginning of a strange and wonderful journey for me. Mostly strange.
I decided to use my time off to meet interesting people and make new friends. No, I wasn’t going to do anything radical, like going to church, joining a sports league or volunteering to serve Thanksgiving meals to bums (Trout), degenerates (you know who – if I say it, I’ll get banned again) and druggies (Viny). No, this was 2009. We had the internet now. I decided to find an internet message board that appealed to my various interests.
I’m a family oriented type of guy. I like kids. I have two of my own. I enjoy sharing my time and talents to offer guidance and direction to youth. I’d actually been missing doing that since I got kicked out of the Boy Scouts. That’s another story entirely, but to avoid 30 PMs asking me what happened, I’ll just explain.
We were working on our health merit badges and I thought a live demonstration using props would be more educational than a dry, boring lecture. So using a banana, a birth control device and a German Shepherd, I demonstrated an important health principle to the boys that was very pertinent to their age range.
Unfortunately, the demonstration startled Adolf.
Apparently the Boy Scouts of America would rather have a bunch of diseased, infected teen-aged boys running around than to have a Scout leader offer a mature, common-sense approach to health.
The Boy Scouts are a petty and vindictive organization. They refused to pay for my medical treatment for injuries suffered in the line of duty. The bite marks on my forearms became infected and my reconstructive ear surgery was incredibly expensive. Way to go, BSA.
Artists Representation
But anyways, I decided to find a new message board. I did some internet research and I found a NAMBLA message board. Yeah, I know it’s a dumb name. Who knows what it means. But Jazzfanzz is a dumb name, too. Everybody knows fans is spelled with an “s”.
"S"
But there seemed to be a great buncha guys on this board. They were very family-oriented and kid friendly. I made a lot of friends; Dan the pediatrician, Bob the elementary school principal, Rick the school bus driver and Mark the Pop Warner football coach.
Some of my new friends.
They did have their idiosyncrasies, though. They didn’t talk about their wives or girlfriends a lot. They’re kinda private that way. But I found it refreshing. No talk about “bitches” and “ho’s”. They were respectful and decent. I liked that. That’s why I accepted an invitation to their picnic. It was held at a weird time, though. I had to take off work a couple hours early to get to the park on time (you know, the one over by that elementary school near State Street).
Unfortunately I had a flat tire on the way over so I was running late. Just as I pulled into the park several squad cars filled with policeman showed up and began fighting with them. I’m not sure if they didn’t get the right permit for the picnic, or what, but because of my restraining order (thanks for nothing Boy Scouts), I decided to make a discreet retreat.
My new friend Tom also decided to make a hasty exit.
(continued below...)
