Would you like an extra spouse with that?

[jimmy eat jazz]

Only if it involved threesomes.

Seriously, why not ask about polyandry also? Polygamy has always been about asymmetric power relations. Women submit to it because they lack the power to oppose it. Men practice it because both they have the power and it gives them more power, and as I think we see with so many 'great men,' sex and power often go hand in hand.

In today's Western society, women are increasingly educated and earning incomes. I believe also in the US, women now outnumber men at universities and women are increasingly becoming the primary breadwinner in families, or if not the primary breadwinner, a significant contributor. It's not outside the realm of the thinkable that if current trends continue, women will become the/a dominant economic force within society and within households. Money is power, and power is . . . well you get it.

This whole discussion polygamy, and the corresponding lack of consideration for polyandry, only goes to show how inherently sexist this whole discussion is. Ask yourselves whether you'd like to be in a polyandrous relationship (I think we know the answer in 99% of cases) and then ask yourselves again why women would feel any differently than you where it comes to polygamy, particularly as they are increasingly less reliant on men for their economic survival.

I also just have to address the comment someone made about how polygamy was/is practiced because men out number women. This is a canard, never was the case, least of all in LDS history. It is a sexist practice that demeans and objectifies women on the whole.

How any otherwise decent person can rationalize this truly horrendous practice away as somehow divine and acceptable is far beyond my abilities to comprehend (and is one of many, but still primary, reasons why I left the LDS Church).

 

[LogGrad98]

This whole discussion polygamy, and the corresponding lack of consideration for polyandry, only goes to show how inherently sexist this whole discussion is. Ask yourselves whether you'd like to be in a polyandrous relationship (I think we know the answer in 99% of cases) and then ask yourselves again why women would feel any differently than you where it comes to polygamy, particularly as they are increasingly less reliant on men for their economic survival.

I used polygamy because it is the non-gender term.

Polygamy (from πολύς γάμος polys gamos, translated literally in Late Greek as "many married")[1] is a marriage which includes more than two partners.[1] When a man is married to more than one wife at a time, the relationship is called polygyny, and there is no marriage bond between the wives; and when a woman is married to more than one husband at a time, it is called polyandry, and there is no marriage bond between the husbands. If a marriage includes multiple husbands and wives, it can be called group marriage.[1]

 

[One Brow]

So, would you want to live in a polygamous relationship? Why or why not? What if you spouse not only gave consent, but encouraged it and helped you find new partners?

My wife and I had an open marriage briefly, but monogamy works better for both of us.

 

[One Brow]

Right - I think it goes without saying that in any culture where polygamy had any degree of success the women were subservient to the men. If you can make it work otherwise then more power to you - I wouldn't even be inclined to try.

While the reverse is true in the handful of cultures that practiced polyandry, but not polygyny. I don't think there has been a culture that practiced polygamy with either sex having multiple partners.

However, at least on atheist blogs, it's common to see people of any sex describe themselves as polyamorous.

 

[jimmy eat jazz]

I used polygamy because it is the non-gender term.

Polygamy and polyandry of very distinct things, and I doubt many people in discussing 'polygamy' have polyandry as part of their frame of reference.

Also, how people here feel about polygamy (mostly men here) will often be quite different than how they feel about polyandry, particularly since it is far easier for them to imagine how they'd feel about the latter than the former. (People tend to be much less in favor of something if they perceive they be the ones disadvantaged/oppressed/inconvenienced/etc. as a result.)

 

[scootsy]

this may sound strange, but i wouldn't mind being in polyandrous marriage. i'm a loner at heart. i only need one child. i have my dog. i could watch all the football i want.

 

[HipHopAnonymous]

My wife and I had an open marriage briefly, but monogamy works better for both of us.

Go on....

 

[jimmy eat jazz]

I used polygamy because it is the non-gender term.

Actually little known by LDS faithful, there were, I believe, instances of polyandry in LDS history. This was not some offshoot Mormon sect but mainstream members during, I believe, the Nauvoo period.

For whatever it's worth.

 

[jimmy eat jazz]

Go on....

If a couple wants an open marriage, and both agree absent coercion or manipulation, more power to them. Probably not the kind of marriage I would want, as I tend to see that it can't be maintained and create the level of trust/intimacy that I think a successful marriage requires. But I suppose there are couples that make it work and are happy with it.

 

[leftyjace]

I have discussed polygamy with many female friends. What I relate is a lot of feedback from them.

I hate to say it, but there's not very many good men out there that are gentlemen and take care of the women in their lives. Plus, many of my friends like the idea of having a career and contributing to the bottom line of the family but not necessarily wanting full responsibility for the children or the household. They wouldn't mind having a female to share that responsibility with... meaning, a backup co-wife type thing. I'm not saying they espouse a difference in male and female responsibilities around the home, but they are cognizant of the fact that men just have different areas where they help - maintenance, landscaping, heavy lifting.

I've joked with some female friends that we all aught to move to a compound together. They jokingly love the idea. What that would mean for sexual relations, I don't know - but they really like the idea.

 

[candrew]

While the reverse is true in the handful of cultures that practiced polyandry, but not polygyny. I don't think there has been a culture that practiced polygamy with either sex having multiple partners.

However, at least on atheist blogs, it's common to see people of any sex describe themselves as polyamorous.

I've been in polyamorous relationships and I've been (currently) married. Believe me when I say they are as different as different can get.

 

[One Brow]

Polygamy and polyandry of very distinct things,

If you had read the definition Stoked quoted for your benefit, you would have seen this was not true. Polygamy is the umbrella term for polygyny, polyandry, and group marriage.

and I doubt many people in discussing 'polygamy' have polyandry as part of their frame of reference.

I agree, but this is an issue of sexism, not vocabulary.