OK, here's a riddle.
You have been captured by Mitt's morons and locked in a steel cube. There are two doors. One, if opened, will suck you into a tube where you will be fed into a the Useless Eaters' Processing Plant which turns you into little green cookies. The other one will get you back on the street with restored Constitutional rights, a sort of super "citizen". The steel panels are twelve inches thick, and lined with two inches of glass on both sides just for spite, because of all the criticism about those chain-link/barbed wire pens they used in Guantanamo. For sport, they hired the devil himself to guard one door. And Mitt got St. Peter himself to guard the other. The devil has sworn on the sulfurous cauldrons that he will never succumb to the tempation to tell the truth again, and St. Peter has sworn on the throne of heaven to never tell a lie again. But in order to secure the Ron Paul vote for Mitt's team, Ron Paul made him promise to give every human swept off the streets into the American Gulag one chance to get himself out. . . . one chance to choose which door he will pick as his chance to leave the AG, and two questions he can ask the guards.
How can you know which door to choose? Remember, the devil can appear as an angel of light, or anyone else he wants to look like, and you only have an intercom anyway to ask your questions.
And OK, so I've become a skeptic and don't believe the devil will keep even his own promise, and it's really quite a tall order to even remember what the truth is sometimes, especially when you're doing your best to lie all the time. And most of us will believe our own lies after telling them a hundred times, and the devil isn't much different. And St. Peter is older than I am, and even I have problems sometimes telling the same story twice, even if I think it is true. And I guess if we can't count on St. Peter, there's no hope anyway. . . . but logically speaking, assuming that this is still somewhat a predictable universe, what would you ask the two guards? And how would you figure out how to make your decision?