Great post.
I will be "that guy" and attempt my own "cool story, bro".
My grandma Ballou has this carved on the back of her tombstone:
DEADER 'N HELL
That is a phrase that she and my grandpa used to say about anything that wouldn't work, turn on, or wasn't alive... It was "Deader than Hell". It is the only thing carved on the back, and it's a big over-the-top style headstone. She was awesome.