Do you Remember?

Do You Remember? (Part 1)

Close your eyes and picture the Jazz. Who do you see? Karl Malone and John Stockton? Deron WIlliams and Carlos Boozer? Gordon Hayward and Rudy Gobert? Now, who do you see next to them? Do you see uniformed heroes or do you see blurry no-names? Where would these “greats” be without their support teams? Their Hornaceks, Kirilenkos, Ostertags, Millsaps, and Russells? Every Jordan needs their Pippen. This my friends, is an ode to those oft forgotten heroes.

Let us begin with one of my favorite friends of all time Jarron Collins, not only was he incredibly smart (graduated from Stanford), he also had a very lengthy stay with our team. While not always appreciated by some, he certainly served a purpose. Fun fact, he is the only player besides Stockton and Malone to have a statue outside of the Vashaw Arena. Not only did they give him one statue, but dozens. Take a look.



Take that Stockton and Malone.

Next we move on to near hall of famer Robert Whaley. Who can forget his adventures with Deron Williams in Park City. Currently he finds himself in the Davis County Jail for robbery. His crime sheet is rivaled only by his stellar Jazz career.



Don’t worry folks our next player has never done anything bad in his entire life. I present to your memory box DeShawn Stevenson. Not only did he contribute the “De” to my name, but he also seemed to be a young talent with a nice jump shot. Not to mention he loved younger women and by the way, who doesn’t? His basketball smarts were rivaled only by his tattoo fashion sense.


Michael Ruffin, what is there to say? He had very large teeth, but everyone loves a nice smile. This 23 game starter racked up a whopping 2.2 points a game, beat that all-stars.


Ronnie Price, heck of a guard, but also winner of the “best smile” contest.


Olden Polynice, how on earth anyone could forget this gentle giant is beyond me. Haiti native Polynice followed Ostertag’s fantastic example and sported the number 0. He also has famously said that if the Bulls had him instead of Pippen that Jordan would have 3 more rings, because he doesn’t get migraines. Preach! https://www.tmz.com/2014/10/24/olden-polynice-michael-jordan-scottie-pippen-chicago-bulls/


With a name as fun to pronounce as he is to watch, Aleksander “Sasha” Pavlovic comes next. Who could forget his heroics in the famous December 3rd, 2003 game against the Rockets in which he scored 19 whoppers. He will go down in the history books as one of the greats, or at least in my eyes. And just look at those full lips.



is there a limit to pictures per post???, this continues on the next posts

Scott Padgett!!! The most gorgeous man to ever sport the Jazz jersey. Ladies, ladies, ahem, stop looking at Sasha, feast your eyes on this chunk of man meat.



Greg Ostertag. A heart of gold, a game of greatness. There is nothing that this man couldn’t have done, but there are plenty of things that he didn’t. For example, not once did I hear of Ostertag punching a kid at McDonalds, or eating bat guano on a family vacation. What I did hear about him is that he had the best tattoo in the league, and let's not forget the kidney he gave his sister and played the NEXT dayish. I can’t even explain this, but yes Playgirl, he is the sexiest of all time.



Mehmet “Money” Okur. If I had a million dollars for every time this big sleepy head made a 3, well, I’d be rich. You usually hear things like “could have protected the paint more”, “would be nice to have a down low presence”, “maybe he should play some defense”. Listen guys, I hear you, but that’s just not his style. Don’t change the legend, change the game. Also, not to rub this in, but how many rings do the “greats” have?


Who better to follow up Memo, but his bestest friend Andrei Kirilenko. (I’m still laughing about that playgirl cover). Kirilenko is one of my all time favorite players, and the most obvious part of my name. He had pazzaz, he could play any position, kind of like my friend Magic Johnson, maybe you’ve heard of him. Kirilenko once played only half a season due to a broken wrist and still led the ENTIRE league in total blocked shots...that’s the stuff legends are made of. He is also one of only 13 players to record a 5x5, which he did 3 separate times. He also sported the most fantastic hair. And his wife famously lets him have a free pass once a year. Also, he allegedly had the coolest nickname in the league, AK-47...I guess if you're into guns and stuff.

Millsap 1 and Millsap 2, or as I prefer to call them Mansap and Boysap. Mansap, was just that 100% man, 100% of the time. When he first came to the Jazz people did not believe, but they soon jumped on the Mansap train and rode it full steam ahead. Personally I still love seeing him do well, even though it breaks my heart that he is gone. Boysap on the other hand, was well, a boy, maybe next year Boysap.

Keith Mcleod, an amazing point guard, if ever there were one. I could go on and on about Mcleod, but if you really want to know anything about him, please contact the poster Coach.



Donyell Marshall, one of the good ones. He currently is tied for the record of most 3’s made in a single game. Back off Stephen Curry. I remember as a wee little lass gathering around the talking picture box just to see how stylish his cornrows would be for the game. I absolutely loved his hair and don’t know why he ever changed his style. Even Karl was envious.


Had he played more than 1 game, Raul Lopez would have been the greatest point guard of all time. Unfortunately his broken knee and Spanish contracts kept him away from us. A sad loss we all still take personally to this day. Every teenage girl's dream, every personal trainer’s nightmare.

Quincy Lewis had the greatest shoes ever. I once got a Jazz calendar and I liked him just for his shoes. What he brought to the court, did not change my opinion of him whatsoever.

The greatest 3 point shooter of all-time Kyle Korver!!! Also, not bad on the eyes and a heck of a nice guy. “He could improve his defense” you say? NO! That’s what Russians are for! Just let him shoot. Unfortunately, he had to compete with 3 hog Memo (also great) while he was here. Come on front office, what are you trying to do to us?!?

Kris Humphries, the most famous man alive. Why you ask? Was it because he married a Kardashian? Was it his career with the Raptors? No, it was his start with the Jazz that put him on the map. He had a fantastic muscle tone, and some even compared his physique to one Karl Malone. Don’t even get me started on his impecible fashion sense.

Speaking of looking fantastic in a suit, let's not forget basketball LEGEND Gordon Giricek. While he was good on the court, he was even better on the side lines. Some might have even hoped that he would get injured so we could feast our eyes on that delicious Croatian. NOT ME, but some. As for his basketball skills, he could be rivaled by none. Other teams feared him and he consistently shot the ball at more than 40% and averaged as many as 10 points a game. All-star material.

The man with the best nickname (well maybe second best, I still like Mansap) Jeff Hornacek. Is it really fair to list him down here with the rest of the “losers”? Yes, he doesn’t have a statue and if his coaching is any indication he never will. However, he was a fantastic shooter and a great co star to the Stockton-Malone production. According to Google his is also one of the best shooting guards in league history and shot almost 50% from the field, so he has that going for him.

Matt Harpring, the worst, or I mean best player ever. Did you know he played football so he is extremely tough. Also, he is an announcer for the Jazz currently so I don’t think we will ever forget that he played football, or that he played for the Jazz, or that he made all of his layups. Jazzgal’s favorite guy, and my favorite friend Matt Harpring, will forever live in our hearts.

Now let's not forget this redhead stud muffin. That’s right ladies and gentlemen, I’m talking about Ben Handlogten. A name that will live in infamy. Sadly, his career with the Jazz ended with an ACL injury after only playing a handful of games. Could you imagine this face on a statue, now that’s one I want to see.

Sundiata Gaines, let’s never forget that name. Remember when he made that game winning shot one time and the whole board went crazy because we loved him and we thought he was the second coming and he was like totally the best ever? You do now.

Howard Eisley, could have gotten us one game closer to winning the championship in the 98 finals when our best friend Dick Bavetta decided that his half time 3 pointer was not shot before the clock expired. However, the league has since said that it was in fact a good shot. This shot would have lead to a 2 point lead for the Jazz at the end of the game (in theory).


The sexiest player with the sexiest name, Carlso Arroyo! Gents, take my advice on this; in fact, try it tonight: whisper in your girl’s ear “hola, me amore, me llamo es Carlos, let me teach you the dance of my people.” Extra points if you nail the accent and can roll your r’s. You will have the best role playing experience of all time. She might even let you touch her arm! But lets get serious, this is a serious basketball post, not dating 101. Carlos Arroyo had the speedy, flashy, exciting game of a Puerto Rican God and a body to match.



C

Carlos Boozer, ah man, this guy! From cheating on a blind guy to all of his crazy yelling, we sure do miss him. Our best power forward since Karl Malone and a force to be reckoned with. Never has adult acne looked so good. I’m just glad we got him before his obvious midlife crisis:

Looking good my friend.

Curtis “Glass Bones” Borchardt. Oh what could have been. For some reason the injury Gods LOVED this guy. Tall, thin, athletic, the face of an angel... everything we ever hoped for, unfortunately he had the bones of a 97 year old woman. He could have been the next Ostertag, dang it!


Louis Amundson, or as I like to call him “kind of Kyle Korver”, is our next stop on the memory train. This rockstar played in 1 dynamite game and famously scored 0 points. Aww, the good ol’ days of scoring how we miss thee.


Well, this concludes part 1 of this 2-3 part series. Stay tuned for more basketball legends.

what is this even?

I love this now I will love it even more once I get my buzz going.

Amazing.

Absolutely fantastic work op

This will be bedtime stories for my future illegitimate children

Old posters are awesome.

How is it that Big Dawg Antoine Carr is not on this list. I'd argue that he was the most important bench player for the Jazz during their NBA Finals seasons...

akirac73 said:

How is it that Big Dawg Antoine Carr is not on this list. I'd argue that he was the most important bench player for the Jazz during their NBA Finals seasons...

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To answer a great question and probably many others to come, this is only part 1...more are to come, also I was 10 years old in 1998 when he stopped playing for the jazz...not much I remember from those days, besides watching the finals and deciding to love the jazz from then on. You'll notice most of these players are from the early 2000s and on. But, I am trying I have a friend or two that might contribute some older players for the next post.

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That was great, kdc. Looking forward to the next installment!

tonstermits said:

I love this now I will love it even more once I get my buzz going.

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Before noon? Well, it's 5:00 somewhere...

You lost me at osterag, he sucks and who ever backs him on this board should be banned. He got dunked on and caused turn overs like no tomorrow. He had only one good game against sac town. I dare someone to debate me on this fact, osterfag was the first stif to play the game.

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K-Man #32 said:

You lost me at osterag, he sucks and who ever backs him on this board should be banned. He got dunked on and caused turn overs like no tomorrow. He had only one good game against sac town. I dare someone to debate me on this fact, osterfag was the first stif to play the game.

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He might be my least favorite player of all time

Yep and cost this franchise millions to be part of many dunk posters from the opposition. He wore zero because he had 0 skill and should have rid the pine.

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he had a good run against the Lakers in the playoffs i think in 97 ? and got his contract, then came into camp out of shape so Malone called him a fatass publicly. Shaq then bitch-slapped him before a game and he was never the same. Not that he was much to start with