look jazzy, im glad you said that you are well respected and liked in your real life. Makes me less worried about you. In your message board life your are mostly ignored, not liked or respected, and considered a troll. Good to know that on jazzfanz you are just acting. Because on jazzfanz you display some red flags for someone who is capable and willing to do something destructive. your online persona comes accross as insecure, unhinged, emotional, angry, and isolated. Once upon a time (early 20's) I worked for a company called Human Affairs international. Part of my job duties (along with filing medical claims and stuff) was to occasionally take calls from a help hotline. People on the other end of the line were often isolated (ignored), emotional, angry, insecure and unhinged and it was my job to calm them down and get them to a more specialized professional to continue to assist them.
Its comforting to know that your real life (liked, respected) seems to be much different from your online persona. Its strange to me to go online and put on an act for the other people on the forum but harmless. Speaking for myself im generally the same online as i am in real life. Im generally well liked in my real life (I wouldn't go so far as to say im respected by the community as 95% of the community has no idea who I am) and generally well liked on jazzfanz. Im just a guy. Nothing very special or unique about me.
Now that I know that your online persona is mostly an act, go ahead and troll on and i wont interfere any longer. Im glad you are harmless but seriously if you ever start feeling destructive seek help or call a hotline or something. Those resources really can make a difference. (I speak from experience on both sides. I have taken calls from those who needed help and I have sought help via therapy and even anger management classes back in my late teens. both helped me out greatly.)