Thoughts and prayers requested

[Rubashov]

Thank you all so much for the kind words. It's been a terrible roller coaster. They did updated scans and found a spot on her pancreas so the surgery just got upgraded. Here I am trying to get to sleep so I can be ready to take her in the morning and I can't get my brain to settle down. We are still hopeful. The dr said the spots could be cancer and could also be a variety of other things and that she and the radiologist both don't think they look like typical cancer nodules in the pancreas but we won't know until they get in there. Today my wife was really happy, felt really optimistic, and I did my best to enjoy that with her and not drag her down, and I think I did pretty good keeping a lid on my worry. I hope she continues to feel that way. My work has been stellar about all this. My boss more or less said take any time I need to take care of her. He said "if you show up one day I'll assume you are at work that day, if you don't, I'll assume you're at home that day. It's up to you but I promise you the paychecks will keep coming no matter what and you won't have to worry about a job here." Fantastic guy. Best boss I've ever had.

And again, thank you all for the great comments and well wishes. It does help sometimes to know you are not alone, even if it is just a bunch of Internet whackos, at least you know someone has your back. Thanks so much. I'll update here when we get more info after the surgery. I'm happy to be part of such a great community here. Love you guys.

Keep your chin up mate. Its great that your boss is being supportive too, makes a huge difference. Just keep the positive vibes going brother.

 

[LogGrad98]

Well the first surgery was really short, because when they got in there to do the hysterectomy they found that the cancer was all over inside her abdomen. The doctor said all the way from the diaphragm to her pelvis. It was all over her colon bladder and pancreas. They said instead of trying to dig it all out, she will instead start with chemotherapy next week, which the doctor seemed hopeful would clean up a lot of the stray cancer nodules, and shrink the bulk of the main tumor, so the next surgery would be much more successful. Definitely was a blow to hear that what we thought was a localized tumor was actually all over. It's exactly a situation like that that killed my wife's mother. Right now she's sleeping off the anesthesia, so she isn't dealing with the full brunt of the news yet. I'm not excited to tell her.

The good news is that the doctor said she has seen cases like this be successfully treated, and getting the patient to a point where they're in remission and might do low level chemotherapy for the rest of their life, or for an extended period of time, to keep the cancer in check. She said it's very difficult before they get the biopsy back to really give a prognosis, but she said if she had to she would give her a good prognosis, a good chance of getting this to remission. But it will take some difficult chemo, and further surgery, maybe even more than we expected, like a hysterectomy combined with a bowel resection, or removing parts of other organs. The good thing is she was able to see the extent of the disease in situ, and get good biopsies of the tumor and of the nodules that are all over inside her abdomen. I really hope the doctors positivity is not misplaced. I guess that's all I can do right now is Hope. But this doctor is at the forefront of gynecologic oncology, as its own field. I know she has been doing this as long as just about anyone in the country, as its own specialty. So I think we have the right people working on it. And I know from my own cancer experience that is a critical aspect of recovery. When I was diagnosed my kind of cancer was so rare my doctor could only find four other cases in the past 20 years and all of those did not survive. He did find one case that did survive, and it just so happened that the doctor who worked on that case took over my case as he was working at the huntsman Cancer Institute at the time. So having a doctor like that taking care of my wife definitely raises my hopes.

 

[NAOS_pt2]

I'm glad you have the right people paying attention to this. You know better than the rest of us how challenging this is going to be. We'll be here for you, m'friend. <3

 

[fishonjazz]

Well the first surgery was really short, because when they got in there to do the hysterectomy they found that the cancer was all over inside her abdomen. The doctor said all the way from the diaphragm to her pelvis. It was all over her colon bladder and pancreas. They said instead of trying to dig it all out, she will instead start with chemotherapy next week, which the doctor seemed hopeful would clean up a lot of the stray cancer nodules, and shrink the bulk of the main tumor, so the next surgery would be much more successful. Definitely was a blow to hear that what we thought was a localized tumor was actually all over. It's exactly a situation like that that killed my wife's mother. Right now she's sleeping off the anesthesia, so she isn't dealing with the full brunt of the news yet. I'm not excited to tell her.

The good news is that the doctor said she has seen cases like this be successfully treated, and getting the patient to a point where they're in remission and might do low level chemotherapy for the rest of their life, or for an extended period of time, to keep the cancer in check. She said it's very difficult before they get the biopsy back to really give a prognosis, but she said if she had to she would give her a good prognosis, a good chance of getting this to remission. But it will take some difficult chemo, and further surgery, maybe even more than we expected, like a hysterectomy combined with a bowel resection, or removing parts of other organs. The good thing is she was able to see the extent of the disease in situ, and get good biopsies of the tumor and of the nodules that are all over inside her abdomen. I really hope the doctors positivity is not misplaced. I guess that's all I can do right now is Hope. But this doctor is at the forefront of gynecologic oncology, as its own field. I know she has been doing this as long as just about anyone in the country, as its own specialty. So I think we have the right people working on it. And I know from my own cancer experience that is a critical aspect of recovery. When I was diagnosed my kind of cancer was so rare my doctor could only find four other cases in the past 20 years and all of those did not survive. He did find one case that did survive, and it just so happened that the doctor who worked on that case took over my case as he was working at the huntsman Cancer Institute at the time. So having a doctor like that taking care of my wife definitely raises my hopes.

Damn bro, that was hard to read. I didn't want to read "the cancer was all over inside her abdomen"
Sorry man. Hope that things get better but all I can say is that I feel for you.

 

[Rubashov]

Well the first surgery was really short, because when they got in there to do the hysterectomy they found that the cancer was all over inside her abdomen. The doctor said all the way from the diaphragm to her pelvis. It was all over her colon bladder and pancreas. They said instead of trying to dig it all out, she will instead start with chemotherapy next week, which the doctor seemed hopeful would clean up a lot of the stray cancer nodules, and shrink the bulk of the main tumor, so the next surgery would be much more successful. Definitely was a blow to hear that what we thought was a localized tumor was actually all over. It's exactly a situation like that that killed my wife's mother. Right now she's sleeping off the anesthesia, so she isn't dealing with the full brunt of the news yet. I'm not excited to tell her.

The good news is that the doctor said she has seen cases like this be successfully treated, and getting the patient to a point where they're in remission and might do low level chemotherapy for the rest of their life, or for an extended period of time, to keep the cancer in check. She said it's very difficult before they get the biopsy back to really give a prognosis, but she said if she had to she would give her a good prognosis, a good chance of getting this to remission. But it will take some difficult chemo, and further surgery, maybe even more than we expected, like a hysterectomy combined with a bowel resection, or removing parts of other organs. The good thing is she was able to see the extent of the disease in situ, and get good biopsies of the tumor and of the nodules that are all over inside her abdomen. I really hope the doctors positivity is not misplaced. I guess that's all I can do right now is Hope. But this doctor is at the forefront of gynecologic oncology, as its own field. I know she has been doing this as long as just about anyone in the country, as its own specialty. So I think we have the right people working on it. And I know from my own cancer experience that is a critical aspect of recovery. When I was diagnosed my kind of cancer was so rare my doctor could only find four other cases in the past 20 years and all of those did not survive. He did find one case that did survive, and it just so happened that the doctor who worked on that case took over my case as he was working at the huntsman Cancer Institute at the time. So having a doctor like that taking care of my wife definitely raises my hopes.

That's a lot to take in, how's it all sitting with you mate?

 

[gandalfe]

I just happened to watch this the other day. If you don't know Hank Green, he was a YouTube science dude, and then a few years ago was diagnosed with Hodgkin's Lymphoma, and was very public and forthcoming with his treatment, He's in remission at this point, but still talks about it.

The tl/dr on this video is that they have found a link between moderate exercise and positive outcomes following surgery for colon cancer, specifically.


View: https://youtu.be/4RXSX93mvg8?si=qjLc8fWj5tw_JZqA

 

[SoberasHotRod]

Well the first surgery was really short, because when they got in there to do the hysterectomy they found that the cancer was all over inside her abdomen. The doctor said all the way from the diaphragm to her pelvis. It was all over her colon bladder and pancreas. They said instead of trying to dig it all out, she will instead start with chemotherapy next week, which the doctor seemed hopeful would clean up a lot of the stray cancer nodules, and shrink the bulk of the main tumor, so the next surgery would be much more successful. Definitely was a blow to hear that what we thought was a localized tumor was actually all over. It's exactly a situation like that that killed my wife's mother. Right now she's sleeping off the anesthesia, so she isn't dealing with the full brunt of the news yet. I'm not excited to tell her.

The good news is that the doctor said she has seen cases like this be successfully treated, and getting the patient to a point where they're in remission and might do low level chemotherapy for the rest of their life, or for an extended period of time, to keep the cancer in check. She said it's very difficult before they get the biopsy back to really give a prognosis, but she said if she had to she would give her a good prognosis, a good chance of getting this to remission. But it will take some difficult chemo, and further surgery, maybe even more than we expected, like a hysterectomy combined with a bowel resection, or removing parts of other organs. The good thing is she was able to see the extent of the disease in situ, and get good biopsies of the tumor and of the nodules that are all over inside her abdomen. I really hope the doctors positivity is not misplaced. I guess that's all I can do right now is Hope. But this doctor is at the forefront of gynecologic oncology, as its own field. I know she has been doing this as long as just about anyone in the country, as its own specialty. So I think we have the right people working on it. And I know from my own cancer experience that is a critical aspect of recovery. When I was diagnosed my kind of cancer was so rare my doctor could only find four other cases in the past 20 years and all of those did not survive. He did find one case that did survive, and it just so happened that the doctor who worked on that case took over my case as he was working at the huntsman Cancer Institute at the time. So having a doctor like that taking care of my wife definitely raises my hopes.

I can't imagine how difficult/ scary this is. It sounds like you are on good hands though.

 

[LogGrad98]

That's a lot to take in, how's it all sitting with you mate?

Ok. In some ways the fact that we have been through a lot of this before helps. The doctor is fairly optimistic so that helps. But in the end all we can to is wait and see.. My wife is naturally pretty optimistic so she just has a roll up your sleeves and get to work kind of attitude and that helps her stay level headed through this kind of stuff.

 

[LogGrad98]

I can't imagine how difficult/ scary this is. It sounds like you are on good hands though.

We think so. The doctor has been great.

 

[LogGrad98]

I just happened to watch this the other day. If you don't know Hank Green, he was a YouTube science dude, and then a few years ago was diagnosed with Hodgkin's Lymphoma, and was very public and forthcoming with his treatment, He's in remission at this point, but still talks about it.

The tl/dr on this video is that they have found a link between moderate exercise and positive outcomes following surgery for colon cancer, specifically.


View: https://youtu.be/4RXSX93mvg8?si=qjLc8fWj5tw_JZqA

Thanks we'll check it out.

 

[Sardines]

**** cancer

 

[FalseFlagg K]

keeping all fingers and toes crossed mate Thats a lot to take in

 

[Rubashov]

**** cancer

Not to be judgemental but that's an odd fetish.

 

[The Midnight]

Thank you all so much for the kind words. It's been a terrible roller coaster. They did updated scans and found a spot on her pancreas so the surgery just got upgraded. Here I am trying to get to sleep so I can be ready to take her in the morning and I can't get my brain to settle down. We are still hopeful. The dr said the spots could be cancer and could also be a variety of other things and that she and the radiologist both don't think they look like typical cancer nodules in the pancreas but we won't know until they get in there. Today my wife was really happy, felt really optimistic, and I did my best to enjoy that with her and not drag her down, and I think I did pretty good keeping a lid on my worry. I hope she continues to feel that way. My work has been stellar about all this. My boss more or less said take any time I need to take care of her. He said "if you show up one day I'll assume you are at work that day, if you don't, I'll assume you're at home that day. It's up to you but I promise you the paychecks will keep coming no matter what and you won't have to worry about a job here." Fantastic guy. Best boss I've ever had.

And again, thank you all for the great comments and well wishes. It does help sometimes to know you are not alone, even if it is just a bunch of Internet whackos, at least you know someone has your back. Thanks so much. I'll update here when we get more info after the surgery. I'm happy to be part of such a great community here. Love you guys.

For the record I’m not one of the wackos.. haha.. well…. maybe.. lol..

Keep us updated man, we’re here for ya !!

 

[str8line]

Well the first surgery was really short, because when they got in there to do the hysterectomy they found that the cancer was all over inside her abdomen. The doctor said all the way from the diaphragm to her pelvis. It was all over her colon bladder and pancreas. They said instead of trying to dig it all out, she will instead start with chemotherapy next week, which the doctor seemed hopeful would clean up a lot of the stray cancer nodules, and shrink the bulk of the main tumor, so the next surgery would be much more successful. Definitely was a blow to hear that what we thought was a localized tumor was actually all over. It's exactly a situation like that that killed my wife's mother. Right now she's sleeping off the anesthesia, so she isn't dealing with the full brunt of the news yet. I'm not excited to tell her.

The good news is that the doctor said she has seen cases like this be successfully treated, and getting the patient to a point where they're in remission and might do low level chemotherapy for the rest of their life, or for an extended period of time, to keep the cancer in check. She said it's very difficult before they get the biopsy back to really give a prognosis, but she said if she had to she would give her a good prognosis, a good chance of getting this to remission. But it will take some difficult chemo, and further surgery, maybe even more than we expected, like a hysterectomy combined with a bowel resection, or removing parts of other organs. The good thing is she was able to see the extent of the disease in situ, and get good biopsies of the tumor and of the nodules that are all over inside her abdomen. I really hope the doctors positivity is not misplaced. I guess that's all I can do right now is Hope. But this doctor is at the forefront of gynecologic oncology, as its own field. I know she has been doing this as long as just about anyone in the country, as its own specialty. So I think we have the right people working on it. And I know from my own cancer experience that is a critical aspect of recovery. When I was diagnosed my kind of cancer was so rare my doctor could only find four other cases in the past 20 years and all of those did not survive. He did find one case that did survive, and it just so happened that the doctor who worked on that case took over my case as he was working at the huntsman Cancer Institute at the time. So having a doctor like that taking care of my wife definitely raises my hopes.

Tough news, Log. Sorry to hear this. It's great that you have a foremost doctor working with you. And you are the best suited person in the world to help her get through this. She helped you with your battle, you now get a chance to pay her back.

 

[LogGrad98]

That's a lot to take in, how's it all sitting with you mate?

Just a day later and it's really up and down. She's struggling with the pain, but this was a truncated surgery so she's really afraid of what the "real" surgery will be like when we finally get there. Of course hearing a doctor say "the cancer is everywhere" is ****ing terrifying, and even with the doctor's caveat of a "very good prognosis" at the end, it's hard not to take that kind of news like getting hit by a truck.

I found her in the bedroom today just sitting on the bed, I walked in and touched her shoulder and she turned to me and just started to sob. That's when it really hit me. I just held her, no words spoken. She trembled and leaned into me and in the end I just told her I love her and am going to be here for her every step of the way. She expressed appreciation for that, and we just sat there together for a while.

33 years together. Feels almost silly to say that, I don't feel like I'm old enough for that. I can't imagine there not being a 34th. And 35th. I told her she can't be done with this life because she needs to make it to our 35th anniversary because we had planned to go back to Hawaii for our 35th if we didn't go sooner. She laughed and promised we'd make it back. I know what those promises mean, but we are both taking it as solid as stone.

But in the end we did get a good prognosis, and I told her what my doctor told us 27 years ago. He said, have your pity party. Take a day or 2 and feel it, feel the impending doom, the grief, the fear and anger, and embrace it. Accept it. Then put it aside and get busy beating the bastard. We talked about that tonight and and went to bed in better spirits. We're in that first phase for this weekend, then we'll put it aside and move forward. And beat that bastard. I'm confident she will come though this with flying colors. And I'm doing all I can to ignore that nagging piece of me that whispers, what if she doesn't? But she will. If I could get through it, who is basically bedridden when I get a stupid cold, then she certainly will. She's a lot stronger than I ever was. She'll make it through, I'm sure of it.

Sorry for rambling. Guess I need to ramble. lol. And again thanks for all your kind words. I don't have much of a support group here, I'm usually the one holding everyone else up, so I appreciate having family at Jazz Fanz to hold me up. Thanks.

 

[efukillar]

I wish you and your wife the best of luck and happiness from Korea. I hope everything goes well.

 

[SoberasHotRod]

Just a day later and it's really up and down. She's struggling with the pain, but this was a truncated surgery so she's really afraid of what the "real" surgery will be like when we finally get there. Of course hearing a doctor say "the cancer is everywhere" is ****ing terrifying, and even with the doctor's caveat of a "very good prognosis" at the end, it's hard not to take that kind of news like getting hit by a truck.

I found her in the bedroom today just sitting on the bed, I walked in and touched her shoulder and she turned to me and just started to sob. That's when it really hit me. I just held her, no words spoken. She trembled and leaned into me and in the end I just told her I love her and am going to be here for her every step of the way. She expressed appreciation for that, and we just sat there together for a while.

33 years together. Feels almost silly to say that, I don't feel like I'm old enough for that. I can't imagine there not being a 34th. And 35th. I told her she can't be done with this life because she needs to make it to our 35th anniversary because we had planned to go back to Hawaii for our 35th if we didn't go sooner. She laughed and promised we'd make it back. I know what those promises mean, but we are both taking it as solid as stone.

But in the end we did get a good prognosis, and I told her what my doctor told us 27 years ago. He said, have your pity party. Take a day or 2 and feel it, feel the impending doom, the grief, the fear and anger, and embrace it. Accept it. Then put it aside and get busy beating the bastard. We talked about that tonight and and went to bed in better spirits. We're in that first phase for this weekend, then we'll put it aside and move forward. And beat that bastard. I'm confident she will come though this with flying colors. And I'm doing all I can to ignore that nagging piece of me that whispers, what if she doesn't? But she will. If I could get through it, who is basically bedridden when I get a stupid cold, then she certainly will. She's a lot stronger than I ever was. She'll make it through, I'm sure of it.

Sorry for rambling. Guess I need to ramble. lol. And again thanks for all your kind words. I don't have much of a support group here, I'm usually the one holding everyone else up, so I appreciate having family at Jazz Fanz to hold me up. Thanks.

We meet up with my sister in law last night who is now dealing with her second round of cancer. She was talking about the advancements in cancer treatment have improved exponentially since her last fight with cancer 10 years ago. Talking to her made me think of your situation. It does feel like there is so much more hope right now.

My dad and sister both passed away from cancer. My Dad was in his 50s and my sister was in her 40s. I wish they had been around during this time when there are so many more options.

 

[The Midnight]

Just a day later and it's really up and down. She's struggling with the pain, but this was a truncated surgery so she's really afraid of what the "real" surgery will be like when we finally get there. Of course hearing a doctor say "the cancer is everywhere" is ****ing terrifying, and even with the doctor's caveat of a "very good prognosis" at the end, it's hard not to take that kind of news like getting hit by a truck.

I found her in the bedroom today just sitting on the bed, I walked in and touched her shoulder and she turned to me and just started to sob. That's when it really hit me. I just held her, no words spoken. She trembled and leaned into me and in the end I just told her I love her and am going to be here for her every step of the way. She expressed appreciation for that, and we just sat there together for a while.

33 years together. Feels almost silly to say that, I don't feel like I'm old enough for that. I can't imagine there not being a 34th. And 35th. I told her she can't be done with this life because she needs to make it to our 35th anniversary because we had planned to go back to Hawaii for our 35th if we didn't go sooner. She laughed and promised we'd make it back. I know what those promises mean, but we are both taking it as solid as stone.

But in the end we did get a good prognosis, and I told her what my doctor told us 27 years ago. He said, have your pity party. Take a day or 2 and feel it, feel the impending doom, the grief, the fear and anger, and embrace it. Accept it. Then put it aside and get busy beating the bastard. We talked about that tonight and and went to bed in better spirits. We're in that first phase for this weekend, then we'll put it aside and move forward. And beat that bastard. I'm confident she will come though this with flying colors. And I'm doing all I can to ignore that nagging piece of me that whispers, what if she doesn't? But she will. If I could get through it, who is basically bedridden when I get a stupid cold, then she certainly will. She's a lot stronger than I ever was. She'll make it through, I'm sure of it.

Sorry for rambling. Guess I need to ramble. lol. And again thanks for all your kind words. I don't have much of a support group here, I'm usually the one holding everyone else up, so I appreciate having family at Jazz Fanz to hold me up. Thanks.

Oh man 33 years..

I don’t think many couples can say that.

That’s a real one.

 

[prodigy]

Sending positive thoughts your way logman and hoping for a good outcome. I'm glad you've got support from members of this community. Cool to see.