What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?

[olden_undercover]

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer?
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We're both lawyers!

 

[LogGrad98]

How many jews does it take to change a lightbulb?

 

[TroutBum]

What time do you go to the dentist?

Tooth-irty!

How many jews does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two, because one of them lost his hands in a law mowing accident.

 

[LogGrad98]

Wrong! It takes 2, one to change the bulb and the other to steady the ladder so the first one doesn't hurt himself.

 

[JAZZGASM]

Helen Keller walks into a bar. And then a table. And then a chair.

 

[JAZZGASM]

My penis was once in the Guinness Book of World Records. Then the librarian told me to take it out.

 

[moevillini]

What time do you go to the dentist?

Tooth-irty!

Heard a bad "Kentucky" joke from friends who live in the Cincinnati area and like to make fun of Kentuckians...

Something about how toothbrushes originated in Kentucky because those folks only have one tooth left in their mouths - and had they originated anywhere else they'd have been called "teethbrushes"

Really dumb, but you should've heard these Ohioans laugh at their joke!!!

 

[HighlandHomie]

A horse walked into a bar, and the bartender asked, 'why the long face?'

...

The horse replied, 'because my wife has terminal cancer.'

 

[[size/HUGE] boobs [/size]]

I like American women. They do things sexually Russian girls never dream of Like showering.

 

[JAZZGASM]

I like American women. They do things sexually Russian girls never dream of Like showering.

Why do the police in Russia travel in threes?

They need one who is able to read, another who can write, and one to keep an eye on the two intellectuals.

 

[BabyPeterzz]

My penis was once in the Guinness Book of World Records. Then the librarian told me to take it out.

Wanna hear a joke about my penis?

Nevermind, it's too long.

 

[TroutBum]

Wanna hear a joke about my penis?

Nevermind, it's too long.

Word. My penis is only 3 inches.

















From the ground.

 

[JAZZGASM]

Wanna hear a joke about my penis?

Nevermind, it's too long.

A girls response:

"Want to hear a joke about my vagina?

Nevermind, you'll never get it."

BTW-I spoke with your lady, she agreed your penis is a joke.

 

[LogGrad98]

Heard a bad "Kentucky" joke from friends who live in the Cincinnati area and like to make fun of Kentuckians...

Something about how toothbrushes originated in Kentucky because those folks only have one tooth left in their mouths - and had they originated anywhere else they'd have been called "teethbrushes"

Really dumb, but you should've heard these Ohioans laugh at their joke!!!

I am in the Cincinnati area right now, in Hebron KY. I should bring that one up at lunch tomorrow. Should be hilarious.

 

[LogGrad98]

Word. My penis is only 3 inches.

















From the ground.

What about during the "up" part of the push-up?

 

[TroutBum]

What about during the "up" part of the push-up?

Haha, I don't DO push-ups.

 

[LogGrad98]

Ok what about the "up" part of the plie?

 

[TroutBum]

Ok what about the "up" part of the plie?

I should have said, "I CAN'T do push-ups". Sorry for the confusion.