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Self-Checkout

Gameface said:
He walks up and they're like "Oh, this is going to be the longest checkout ever."
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It depends.

I am known quite well in some places, for being the most efficient self-checkout guy in town. They smile, offer help, and I say I've got this. And then I impress them with my speed and efficiency. I'm famous, I think.

Whether I'm sitting on my *** or standing on my feet makes all the difference.

Haircuts with cute snippers sometimes get dicey. I got butchered, really, once for trying to tell the barber how nice Putin is.

But then when I tell jokes about cow licks they seem to think it's all fun.
 
babe said:
It depends.

I am known quite well in some places, for being the most efficient self-checkout guy in town. They smile, offer help, and I say I've got this. And then I impress them with my speed and efficiency. I'm famous, I think.

Whether I'm sitting on my *** or standing on my feet makes all the difference.

Haircuts with cute snippers sometimes get dicey. I got butchered, really, once for trying to tell the barber how nice Putin is.

But then when I tell jokes about cow licks they seem to think it's all fun.
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In real life, I'm smarter than Elon Musk, make fewer enemies than Mother Teresa, and know more about politics than Biden and Trump combined. Almost as much as Maurice Strong, and Jon Huntsman Sr. And I know where Henry Kissinger's bedpan is.
 
I love self checkout. What I hate are people who go through it with 50 items or take forever putting bills in the wrong direction and fishing for exact change. Hurry your *** up, my ice cream is melting.
 
Really ***** me. They cant put on a couple of teenage kids to do it? I'd love to know how much theft goes on through them. Which just gets passed on to honest customers....
 
Rubashov said:
Really ***** me. They cant put on a couple of teenage kids to do it? I'd love to know how much theft goes on through them. Which just gets passed on to honest customers....
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My guess....lots and lots. We turned in a couple at a Sam's Club. They had 3 whole briskets, like 6 racks of ribs, 4 or 5 pork butts, etc. in a single cart. They were ahead of us in the whole self-checkout thing and they were looking around kind of weird. I thought they were looking for their kid. But then I watched the guy scan only some of the items in the cart while his wife distracted the lone employee that was nearby. He then buried the stuff he didn't scan and then hurried to get out of there. I went ahead after I saw this and told a manager near the exit to check their receipt closely. We got there close to the same time as my wife had checked out while I was talking to the manager and we heard the guy saying "oh I must have missed that one" as the manager scanned the barcodes and checked the quantities, yeah missed 2 of your $75 briskets and half the other meat, on accident. Sure.

But yes we all pay for it in the long run.

The manager thanked us as we went by, completely oblivious to the crab legs we had buried under the toilet paper. Heh heh heh.

Sucker.
 
I'm not a huge Walmart fan, but I have to hand it to them, they are all over self-checkout with stations up the wazoo. My Target has four stations and I can always count on someone needing help because they're trying to buy a gift card or their app isn't working.
 
LogGrad98 said:
My guess....lots and lots. We turned in a couple at a Sam's Club. They had 3 whole briskets, like 6 racks of ribs, 4 or 5 pork butts, etc. in a single cart. They were ahead of us in the whole self-checkout thing and they were looking around kind of weird. I thought they were looking for their kid. But then I watched the guy scan only some of the items in the cart while his wife distracted the lone employee that was nearby. He then buried the stuff he didn't scan and then hurried to get out of there. I went ahead after I saw this and told a manager near the exit to check their receipt closely. We got there close to the same time as my wife had checked out while I was talking to the manager and we heard the guy saying "oh I must have missed that one" as the manager scanned the barcodes and checked the quantities, yeah missed 2 of your $75 briskets and half the other meat, on accident. Sure.

But yes we all pay for it in the long run.

The manager thanked us as we went by, completely oblivious to the crab legs we had buried under the toilet paper. Heh heh heh.

Sucker.
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Dude I used to know would steal loads in the early days of these things just because he could. He would in general steal anything if he was sure he could get away with it.

I found it hilarious after he had stolen thousands from his employer he was whinging that he lost his job when he got caught.
 
Rubashov said:
Dude I used to know would steal loads in the early days of these things just because he could. He would in general steal anything if he was sure he could get away with it.

I found it hilarious after he had stolen thousands from his employer he was whinging that he lost his job when he got caught.
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In the U.S. retail theft is huge. The people who steal the most... the employees.
 
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