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The Exorcism of Black Jesus

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Brothers.

Sisters.



How have we been deceived for so long?


Trey joined our team as a happy man. A man of stern faith, and of a loving family. A man well-known for his never-give-up attitude; his lunch-pail work-ethic; and, most importantly, his heroics.


1168573.jpg



We prayed for the Arrival of Black Jesus to the land known as Wasatch. Our Creator answered, and took our two sacrifices in return for bestowing this Holy Man upon us.


We cheered. We cried. Dalamon almost crashed his car when his little brother read-out that tweet, letting out an inhumane-screech in the process. NUMBERICA promised me an everlasting friendship.



Times were good. Times were very good.






Alas, what happened?


First, he was smitten with an injury. A finger jammed into an athlete. Since then, Burke has never been the same. No amount of practice has resulted in accurate shooting. His mechanics are sound, his attitude is confident; and yet, time and time again, his hard work merely results in the clanks of rims, and with the whizzing sound of a ball flying through the air, but missing the target significantly.


It begs the question: who caused this injury?

Was it a mere mortal?


A simple google-search reveals the identity of an athlete-- an athlete with a peculiarly idiosyncratic double first name.

Chris Paul.


Why peculiar? Why two first names-- both of which as banal, and boringly human as possible? Is this a cover? Are we being misled?


Let's look at a picture of this peculiar 'athlete'


famous-athletes-when-they-were-young-28.jpg



Doesn't look out of the ordinary, no?



....



Are you SURE that you've never seen this face before?


Unfortunately, the answer is probably yes-- unless, you're a demonologist.....


9OWDNTG.jpg





Jazzfanz, I hope you now know who we are dealing with. My intuition says that it is Baal himself-- but I am no expert.


Friends, pls recruit WhiskyPriest. And hurry.

The Exorcism must begin.


Amen.

All praise to He,


dt.common.streams.StreamServer.jpg


BJB




Amen
 
The Exorcism will be a group effort. I am simply calling attention to this necessity-- I am not sure I have the inner strength to lead this exorcism.
 
Jazzfanz, pls pitch your ideas as to hwo we will go about this Exorcism.

Burned jerseys. Goat sacrifices. Anything for our saviour-- He, BJB.
 
Sounds like there's no problem with Black Jesus... it's the rims that need exorcism...
 
Well done dala. I lol'd and lol'd (though I'm certain this is no joking matter, the powers of cee-three-drinks-his-own-pee reach far and wide)

 
Well done dala. I lol'd and lol'd (though I'm certain this is no joking matter, the powers of cee-three-drinks-his-own-pee reach far and wide)


The demon formerly known as CP3 is a total douche on the surface-- but do not let it obscure the evil that resides deep inside of him


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Brothers.

Sisters.



How have we been deceived for so long?


Trey joined our team as a happy man. A man of stern faith, and of a loving family. A man well-known for his never-give-up attitude; his lunch-pail work-ethic; and, most importantly, his heroics.


1168573.jpg



We prayed for the Arrival of Black Jesus to the land known as Wasatch. Our Creator answered, and took our two sacrifices in return for bestowing this Holy Man upon us.


We cheered. We cried. Dalamon almost crashed his car when his little brother read-out that tweet, letting out an inhumane-screech in the process. NUMBERICA promised me an everlasting friendship.



Times were good. Times were very good.






Alas, what happened?


First, he was smitten with an injury. A finger jammed into an athlete. Since then, Burke has never been the same. No amount of practice has resulted in accurate shooting. His mechanics are sound, his attitude is confident; and yet, time and time again, his hard work merely results in the clanks of rims, and with the whizzing sound of a ball flying through the air, but missing the target significantly.


It begs the question: who caused this injury?

Was it a mere mortal?


A simple google-search reveals the identity of an athlete-- an athlete with a peculiarly idiosyncratic double first name.

Chris Paul.


Why peculiar? Why two first names-- both of which as banal, and boringly human as possible? Is this a cover? Are we being misled?


Let's look at a picture of this peculiar 'athlete'


famous-athletes-when-they-were-young-28.jpg



Doesn't look out of the ordinary, no?



....



Are you SURE that you've never seen this face before?


Unfortunately, the answer is probably yes-- unless, you're a demonologist.....


9OWDNTG.jpg





Jazzfanz, I hope you now know who we are dealing with. My intuition says that it is Baal himself-- but I am no expert.


Friends, pls recruit WhiskyPriest. And hurry.

The Exorcism must begin.


Amen.

All praise to He,


dt.common.streams.StreamServer.jpg


BJB




Amen

Always knew Chris Paul of the Los Angeles Clippers, formerly scholared by the University of Wake Forest (Roffchilds), whom stands 6 foot one inches and has a closeted reputation of conspumtion of urine would also be a baphomet wielding, pentagram burning demon.
 
Always knew Chris Paul of the Los Angeles Clippers, whom stands 6 foot one inches and has a closeted reputation of conspumtion of urine would also be a baphomet wielding, pentagram burning demon.

How could we have been so stupid for not realizing sooner


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
Srsly yall. Anyone ever do any exorcisms? Need tips.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
How could we have been so stupid for not realizing sooner


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I bet he also practices sex magik with Blake Griffin, formerly scholared from the University of Oklahoma, where 250 years ago they performed ritualistic human sacrifices on Indian homeland. It all adds up now.
 
Srsly yall. Anyone ever do any exorcisms? Need tips.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

First step: Ânal Beads.
Second step: ????
....
....
....
Climax.

I bet he also practices sex magik with Blake Griffin, formerly scholared from the University of Oklahoma, where 250 years ago they performed ritualistic human sacrifices on Indian homeland. It all adds up now.

Bro.
 
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