Finances and marriage........
- Thread starter Duck Rodgers
- Start date
GoJazz
Well-Known Member
I run a business and pay myself from that business. My wife has our personal bank accounts. I deposit the money from the business into that account from which she pays bills and buys whatever she wants. It works because any large purchases she has to come to me or if our monthly cash runs out or is running low she has to come to me for more cash at which time we talk about it.
Hartsock
Banned
My wife is impossiby bad with money, like when we first got married I would get paid on friday morning and would be out of money by the time I got home from work friday night. So now we have one account, I keep the card, she gets cash when she needs it. I pay the bills, take care of saving, make the budget, and have learned to tell her no. We are much better off now.
My In-Laws have/had a crazy situation. My FIL is a construction guy so he makes like $30 bucks and hour working 60 hour weeks, not great money, but enough to be well enough off. They are so in debt, so behind on bills, so broke that it blows my mind. They live rent free, in her parents old house, only have 1 kid at home, and are still struggling really bad. My MIL gets an allowance from her mom, like a big allowance of probably 5k a month and still blows through that and her husbands check with ease. There are huge piles of clothes that lay around the house with all the tags still on them, she just buys them to buy them. My FIL will not even have lunch money often times because his wife has blown through the check the day the get it. Well my MIL died recently, and my FIL told me that he is finding out about credit cards he didnt know existed that are maxed out, finding thousands of dollars in cash buried in piles of clothes, finding thousands of dollars in uncashed checks from months and years ago. He told me this is the first time he has had over $100 in savings in 15 years. He is 45 years old. It sickens me.
My In-Laws have/had a crazy situation. My FIL is a construction guy so he makes like $30 bucks and hour working 60 hour weeks, not great money, but enough to be well enough off. They are so in debt, so behind on bills, so broke that it blows my mind. They live rent free, in her parents old house, only have 1 kid at home, and are still struggling really bad. My MIL gets an allowance from her mom, like a big allowance of probably 5k a month and still blows through that and her husbands check with ease. There are huge piles of clothes that lay around the house with all the tags still on them, she just buys them to buy them. My FIL will not even have lunch money often times because his wife has blown through the check the day the get it. Well my MIL died recently, and my FIL told me that he is finding out about credit cards he didnt know existed that are maxed out, finding thousands of dollars in cash buried in piles of clothes, finding thousands of dollars in uncashed checks from months and years ago. He told me this is the first time he has had over $100 in savings in 15 years. He is 45 years old. It sickens me.
Sheesh .. it's easy enough to struggle and be broke to add being a complete dumbhead to the equation.
Hartsock
Banned
I had to explain to my wife that if you go to one store and spend $50 its only $50, but if you go to 8 stores and spend $50 at each place that is $400. It was like a light turned on in her head. She still ditzilly spends money without thinking about it, but she has gotten better.
candrew
Well-Known Member
LOL - I have a similar problem with my wife. My wife doesn't spend a lot of money on herself; but she thinks as long as she is buying something "for the family" or "for the house" then she can go through our money like **** through a goose. I had to explain to her that $500 is $500 no matter if it's for her, the family or if you're ****ing burning it.
Hartsock
Banned
You know how much I spent on christmas for her family? And for her little sisters birthday? Almost as much as i spent on my family for christmas and for my own daughters bday. Any protest from me meant I hated her family and we would never have to visit them anymore. Oh well, at least they had a good christmas and her sister got some nice stuff.
I want to start an "opt out of Christmas gift giving/receiving" movement. I don't want gifts and I absolutely hate shopping for them. In my opinion 90% of the gifts I give and at least that many that I receive are total junk I don't want. I see so many of the extended family type gifts that are items that seem to be manufactured and marketed specifically to provide people with some cheap piece of junk they can pass off as a gift. The kind of crap no one would ever buy because they wanted the item, just some cutesy crap that allows them to cross a name or two off their list of obligation. I hate it so much it makes me want to yell. I just want out of the whole thing.
EDIT: maybe I could modify the movement so that it only precludes store-bought gift giving. So if someone made cookies, or a sweater, or quilt, or beer, or a dog house, or whatever, then that's fine. Just no disposable gifts.
My MIL bought for the entire family some total junk as seen on TV knife that has a stupid thing hanging off it that acts as a guide so that all your slices are the same thickness. I like to cook, so I have good knives. There's nothing in the world as awesome as having truly good knives to use when cooking, imo. They make all the difference. So anyway, I wouldn't use the piece of junk serrated blade $2 knife in the first place, and in the second place I know how to cut things uniformly and I can cut things much thinner than the thinnest setting of this stupid knife she gave me. I'm not trying to be unappreciative, but at the same time she bought everyone in the family one of these knives because she apparently found a bin full of them at big lots or something and was happy enough to be able to say she was finished with her x-mas shopping. I would have loved to save her the time and money and just tell her to cross my name off the list and don't get me anything. If it went both ways that would have honestly been the best gift I got this x-mas for the amount of stress I wouldn't have to deal with next year.
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Mine's very similar ..
We can leave the house with, say, $500.
By the time we're heading home, I may mention that we spent the whole $500.. she is absolutely certain there is NO way that it's true. She asks how that could be.. I start to explain it to her and she gets pizzed telling me I'm holding it over her head ... lolol.
We can leave the house with, say, $500.
By the time we're heading home, I may mention that we spent the whole $500.. she is absolutely certain there is NO way that it's true. She asks how that could be.. I start to explain it to her and she gets pizzed telling me I'm holding it over her head ... lolol.
Me too. I want just a quiet and intimate Christmas morning with those that live under our roof. Everyone else can just do the same. Screw the hectic waste of time and money on everything/everybody else.
Beantown
Well-Known Member
candrew
Well-Known Member
My wife and I started our own little mini-revolt with Christmas Cards. It got ridiculous. We were getting/sending cards to about 100 people/families we barely knew or distant relatives we had nothing to do with. So we just went Cold Turkey about 3 years ago and stopped sending them out to everyone. We still get a handful every year; but most people got the hint.
Btw, I'm not bagging on my wife. No matter who you choose, they'll be imperfect ..
I am thankful that I have a wife that is completely excitable. If I came home today and said, guess what .. we're moving to Texas .. she'd be like yee-haw!! I'll start packing.
If I said, Michigan, Florida, Maine, Germany .. anywhere, she wouldn't even care why .. she's just always ready to do anything and is always excited about nearly everything. Not even in a ditzy way, just really loves to go live, explore, and doesn't have that "yeah whatever" type attitude that MOST people (men and women) have.
I'm okay with her being mathematical retard in exchange for being seriously fun/funny.
I am thankful that I have a wife that is completely excitable. If I came home today and said, guess what .. we're moving to Texas .. she'd be like yee-haw!! I'll start packing.
If I said, Michigan, Florida, Maine, Germany .. anywhere, she wouldn't even care why .. she's just always ready to do anything and is always excited about nearly everything. Not even in a ditzy way, just really loves to go live, explore, and doesn't have that "yeah whatever" type attitude that MOST people (men and women) have.
I'm okay with her being mathematical retard in exchange for being seriously fun/funny.
That's awesome. We have never sent cards. Glad we didn't.
My next thing I have to deal with is feeling the need to fly my huge *** family back to Kentucky every year for Christmas .. robs me/us of the whole thing. WAY to hectic.
