Archie Moses
Well-Known Member
Marriage advice thread. I'll read this when I get back from my honeymoon in a week. haha
I just got married. Advice?
- Thread starter Archie Moses
- Start date
Marriage advice thread. I'll read this when I get back from my honeymoon in a week. haha
Don't Archie it up. ;-)
More seriously, here is some advice:
(a) have common goals; that way you grow together, not apart
(b) learn to compromise
(c) communication is key
(d) don't spend beyond your means
Remember that just because 50% of marriages end in divorce (or whatever the current stat is), that doesn't mean there's a 50% chance that *your* marriage will end in divorce. There are lots of things you can do (the above items just to name a few) to put yourself well above the national average.
Oh, and congrats!!
More seriously, here is some advice:
(a) have common goals; that way you grow together, not apart
(b) learn to compromise
(c) communication is key
(d) don't spend beyond your means
Remember that just because 50% of marriages end in divorce (or whatever the current stat is), that doesn't mean there's a 50% chance that *your* marriage will end in divorce. There are lots of things you can do (the above items just to name a few) to put yourself well above the national average.
Oh, and congrats!!
Marty McFly
Well-Known Member
Find things you like to do together. That's the key.
NAOS
Well-Known Member
There are lots of people with good advice, but let me give you a little that you're not likely to hear. First, don't put too much pressure on your interactions. Today most people have jobs + fill their idle time (ahem, this site) with intensely interactive exchanges. Marriage isn't often that, or at least I don't think it should be. It's too hard to live under those expectations. Second -- and related to the first -- in addition to supporting and exploring experiences that you can share together, you should support WITH EQUAL VIGOR new experiences for your partner, in which you know she is interested, but DON'T include you. Too many of my friends have gotten paranoid when their partner has inspirations that take them out of their intensely interactive little niche and many partners don't explore enough outside the limited range of their shared interests.
2 tips, from the Sage.
Good luck and congrats! As long has you keep bringing the humor these little tips are the least I can do.
2 tips, from the Sage.
Good luck and congrats! As long has you keep bringing the humor these little tips are the least I can do.
+1. This is very important.
Oh, and in a long term sense. Not just the honeymoon...
C l u t c H 385
Banned
get the **** off of jazzfanz and go nail ur wife?
Remember the first few months are great but the first year can be rough. Avoid arguments as much as possible by compromising.
The advice to never go to sleep angry is crap. Sometimes you just need to sleep on it and you'll be fine in the morning.
Don't ditch your friends. Lots of couples are so into each other that the stop hanging out with their friends, especially single ones. You will regret it later.
Apologize for every time you get a dirty look from your wife even if your in the right or did nothing wrong. My wife just informed me that insincere apologies don't count. So get good at fake sincerity.
Wear a condom or get her on a pill. No one should have a kid in their first year. I am sure a bunch of people will tell me they had a kid right away and its so great and worked for them..... Enjoy time with the 2 of you before kids come. I know this is hard for you mormons.
Have sex in the morning its great.
Just a reminder that will go to jail and or hell for beating your wife.
and the most important advice: Ignore people's advice and do what works for you.
The advice to never go to sleep angry is crap. Sometimes you just need to sleep on it and you'll be fine in the morning.
Don't ditch your friends. Lots of couples are so into each other that the stop hanging out with their friends, especially single ones. You will regret it later.
Apologize for every time you get a dirty look from your wife even if your in the right or did nothing wrong. My wife just informed me that insincere apologies don't count. So get good at fake sincerity.
Wear a condom or get her on a pill. No one should have a kid in their first year. I am sure a bunch of people will tell me they had a kid right away and its so great and worked for them..... Enjoy time with the 2 of you before kids come. I know this is hard for you mormons.
Have sex in the morning its great.
Just a reminder that will go to jail and or hell for beating your wife.
and the most important advice: Ignore people's advice and do what works for you.
candrew
Well-Known Member
"Plaster on a fake smile for the next half century, sit back, relax and wait for the sweet embrace of death....."
Rob Coddry, Heartbreak Kid
But seriously...
I think Colton got most of them - I'll add don't ever take for granted the things she does for you - no matter how large or small. Living with someone day after day, year after year, it's easy to forget how much you do for each other.
Showing appreciation and saying thank you goes a long way in a marraige.
Rob Coddry, Heartbreak Kid
But seriously...
I think Colton got most of them - I'll add don't ever take for granted the things she does for you - no matter how large or small. Living with someone day after day, year after year, it's easy to forget how much you do for each other.
Showing appreciation and saying thank you goes a long way in a marraige.
davidbenoit
Well-Known Member
Yeah that suit is pimpin'! And an orchid boutonniere? Shoot!
I'll add to this that when you are upset with her think of all the great things you love about her. I find that I can usually get over whatever I'm upset about fairly quickly.
Also be ready to swallow your pride and be the first one to approach the other after having a "disagreement". It is very easy to harden yourself to the point where you can be so pissed that you won't show show any regret. It's very easy for a silly reason to turn into several days of not speaking to each other.
You'll be amazed at how much sex can be "purchased" by doing housework. Doing the dishes or vacuuming the house and just picking up after yourself will result in more and willing sex.
Surprise her with a bouquet of flowers or a card every once in a while. At least once a month. Women eat this **** up.
Beyond that Colton pretty much nailed it. I cannot stress enough the monetary issue. The only downside to this is if she has no financial self control. If she can't control her spending or live within the means of your financial situation as a couple you are in for a rocky ride.
Lastly, and this is very important, stay away from hookers and drugs. They tend to muck things up... ;-)
Good luck!!