D
Deleted member 848
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Good bump. Something to keep us occupied as the negotiating goes on today
Jazz Poetry
- Thread starter Jazz Spazz
- Start date
Good bump. Something to keep us occupied as the negotiating goes on today
Once, there was this girl... who,
Wore the number 34 and was a vicious tool.
And when, she finally stopped chucking,
It. Was. Too late we'd already lost it.
I couldn't quite explain it, she'd always just suuuuucked ***.
Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm
Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm
Once, there was this *** face,
Who had the gayest first name ever, and couldn't make a damn shot.
And when, 19 came back to Utah,
There. Was. Much wailing and gnashing of teeth.
I couldn't quite explain it, I guess we needed a veeeeeteran.
Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm
Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm
Then, there was this douche bag.
Who pouted like a little bitch and never made the All Stars.
But then, we traded his ***.
And. Got. A crap-ton better on paper.
We're still a bunch of losers, we'll never win the championnnnship.
Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm
Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm
Wore the number 34 and was a vicious tool.
And when, she finally stopped chucking,
It. Was. Too late we'd already lost it.
I couldn't quite explain it, she'd always just suuuuucked ***.
Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm
Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm
Once, there was this *** face,
Who had the gayest first name ever, and couldn't make a damn shot.
And when, 19 came back to Utah,
There. Was. Much wailing and gnashing of teeth.
I couldn't quite explain it, I guess we needed a veeeeeteran.
Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm
Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm
Then, there was this douche bag.
Who pouted like a little bitch and never made the All Stars.
But then, we traded his ***.
And. Got. A crap-ton better on paper.
We're still a bunch of losers, we'll never win the championnnnship.
Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm
Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm
This lockout ******* sucks
Greedy ******* arguing over a few bucks
My fandom's clock is striking midnight
Having to endure carolinajazz' racial fright
Please come back, 'O NBA
But do it quickly or else maany will just stay away
Stay away we may while your profits wane
Just too much drama for us to sustain
Find something else to do with out time we might
Hurry, hurry, or my *** you can bite
Greedy ******* arguing over a few bucks
My fandom's clock is striking midnight
Having to endure carolinajazz' racial fright
Please come back, 'O NBA
But do it quickly or else maany will just stay away
Stay away we may while your profits wane
Just too much drama for us to sustain
Find something else to do with out time we might
Hurry, hurry, or my *** you can bite
NotDeadYet
Well-Known Member
Now THAT was really good!!!
Underrated. It seems I can't give rep to the same post twice, but consider this a ringing +9.
AlaskanAssassin
Well-Known Member
Upset Minded
Team Oriented
Aggressive
Hopperific
Jams Galore
Absolutely playoff bound
Zebra's take away wins
Zero Championships
Team Oriented
Aggressive
Hopperific
Jams Galore
Absolutely playoff bound
Zebra's take away wins
Zero Championships
This is a new era, got to see what works
is it Bell, Hayward, CJ, or Burks
The frontline is aplenty and some have gotten in shape
but no one plays the game quite like the Turks
We have to wait, we have to see
whether the young guys save their money or no pot to pee
Christmas is coming, what is our gift
Will it be sepanol or AKMVP, you get the drift
When it's all said and done, we'll win 59
all because Ty finally forced baseline
is it Bell, Hayward, CJ, or Burks
The frontline is aplenty and some have gotten in shape
but no one plays the game quite like the Turks
We have to wait, we have to see
whether the young guys save their money or no pot to pee
Christmas is coming, what is our gift
Will it be sepanol or AKMVP, you get the drift
When it's all said and done, we'll win 59
all because Ty finally forced baseline
We need to raise the stakes
Raise the bar
Now win it all, we've come this far
Time to shake off the sadness
Erase the hate
Bring some happiness back to the beehive state
Will it happen?
Could it be?
We'll just have to wait and see
Until then we'll argue
Until then we'll expect the worst
And all these 'men' will continue to carry a purse
Raise the bar
Now win it all, we've come this far
Time to shake off the sadness
Erase the hate
Bring some happiness back to the beehive state
Will it happen?
Could it be?
We'll just have to wait and see
Until then we'll argue
Until then we'll expect the worst
And all these 'men' will continue to carry a purse
Jazz Haiku
There once was a man from Nantucket
He's not on the Jazz. In fact, he's not even a good basketball player. Runs a successful fishing operation in Rhode Island, however, and seems happy. Which, at the end of the day, is all that really matters.
Go Jazz.
There once was a man from Nantucket
He's not on the Jazz. In fact, he's not even a good basketball player. Runs a successful fishing operation in Rhode Island, however, and seems happy. Which, at the end of the day, is all that really matters.
Go Jazz.
Already posted in the God thread, but I'm working on the post count:
Praise to The Gordon
Who assisted to Mansap
Corbin anointed our Shooter and Seer.
Blessed to open the
Giant Can of Whoop ***
Jazz Fanz shall cheer him
And Kobe run in fear.
HAIL TO THE GORDON
Descended from Heaven
Weiner Dicks and Douche Bags...
Shall mock him in vain
Mingling with hotties
He's got no time for bull ****!
The Laker's shall not conquer
The Gordon again.
Fin.
Praise to The Gordon
Who assisted to Mansap
Corbin anointed our Shooter and Seer.
Blessed to open the
Giant Can of Whoop ***
Jazz Fanz shall cheer him
And Kobe run in fear.
HAIL TO THE GORDON
Descended from Heaven
Weiner Dicks and Douche Bags...
Shall mock him in vain
Mingling with hotties
He's got no time for bull ****!
The Laker's shall not conquer
The Gordon again.
Fin.
Grandpa Jazz
Active Member
Working on something epic for this thread. Will take me awhile. I have zero talent in this direction so i took it as a challenge.
Grandpa Jazz
Active Member
PAUL With The Ball
The future wasn't brilliant for the swat city five that season; the record stood at 1 and three with but a shortened season yet to play, and then Harris went in the tank and Bell did the same, a sickly silence fell upon the patrons of the game.
A straggling few got up to go. Leaving there the rest, with that hope that springs enternal within the human breast; They thought, " If only Paul could get the ball....We'd put even money now if only Paul could get the ball.
But Hayward shot the next ball and also did C.J. Miles. The former was a pudding and the later was a flake; So upon that stricken multitude grim melancholy sat; for there seemed but little chance of Paul getting the ball.
But Harris let fly a three ball, to the wonderment of all, and Burks the much despised tore the strings right off the Rim; and when the time out ended and we could see what had occured. The New Orleans five had a two point lead and it was a fadin fast.
Then from twenty thousand throats rose up a joyous yell; It rumbled in the nose-bleed seats and rattled on the court. It pounded on the TV mikes and recoiled upon the Bear. For PAUL, mighty PAUL, was setting up in the post.
There was ease in Paul's manner as he fronted his defender; there was pride in PAUL'S bearing and confidence lit up Paul's face. And when responding to the cheers, he called for the ball. No stranger in the crowd could doubt twas Paul setting up in the post.
Forty thousand eyes were on him as he faked right then left. Twenty thousand hearts exploded as he rose into the air. The defender put a hip into him, and the ball bounced off the rim. Defiance flashed in Paul's eye and a sneer curled Paul's lip.
And now the leather covered sphere goes higher into the lights and when it does come down again it's into Paul's big mitt's. He shoots again and again is hacked. And again there is no call.
Fraud! cried the maddened thousands and the echo answered "fraud". But Paul has the ball again and his teeth are clenched in anger. Once again he shoots, and again the ball shoots skyward but Paul is there with out raised hand and now the air is shattered by the force of Pauls big "Flush"
And 1.
Oh, somewhere in this favored land the clouds are dark as night, somewhere a band is playing "rap", somewhere Men are groaning and little children cry; but there is only joy in Swat Lake City as this Damn season "ain't over yet"!
With apologies to Earnest L. Thayer and prose lover's everywhere.
The future wasn't brilliant for the swat city five that season; the record stood at 1 and three with but a shortened season yet to play, and then Harris went in the tank and Bell did the same, a sickly silence fell upon the patrons of the game.
A straggling few got up to go. Leaving there the rest, with that hope that springs enternal within the human breast; They thought, " If only Paul could get the ball....We'd put even money now if only Paul could get the ball.
But Hayward shot the next ball and also did C.J. Miles. The former was a pudding and the later was a flake; So upon that stricken multitude grim melancholy sat; for there seemed but little chance of Paul getting the ball.
But Harris let fly a three ball, to the wonderment of all, and Burks the much despised tore the strings right off the Rim; and when the time out ended and we could see what had occured. The New Orleans five had a two point lead and it was a fadin fast.
Then from twenty thousand throats rose up a joyous yell; It rumbled in the nose-bleed seats and rattled on the court. It pounded on the TV mikes and recoiled upon the Bear. For PAUL, mighty PAUL, was setting up in the post.
There was ease in Paul's manner as he fronted his defender; there was pride in PAUL'S bearing and confidence lit up Paul's face. And when responding to the cheers, he called for the ball. No stranger in the crowd could doubt twas Paul setting up in the post.
Forty thousand eyes were on him as he faked right then left. Twenty thousand hearts exploded as he rose into the air. The defender put a hip into him, and the ball bounced off the rim. Defiance flashed in Paul's eye and a sneer curled Paul's lip.
And now the leather covered sphere goes higher into the lights and when it does come down again it's into Paul's big mitt's. He shoots again and again is hacked. And again there is no call.
Fraud! cried the maddened thousands and the echo answered "fraud". But Paul has the ball again and his teeth are clenched in anger. Once again he shoots, and again the ball shoots skyward but Paul is there with out raised hand and now the air is shattered by the force of Pauls big "Flush"
And 1.
Oh, somewhere in this favored land the clouds are dark as night, somewhere a band is playing "rap", somewhere Men are groaning and little children cry; but there is only joy in Swat Lake City as this Damn season "ain't over yet"!
With apologies to Earnest L. Thayer and prose lover's everywhere.
Last edited:
Archie Moses
Well-Known Member
When the Jazz make basket I go off
When CJ and Raja a shoot, face palm and cough.
Paul Millsap and Big Al are the perfect marriage
I hope CJ and Raja get run over by a horse and carriage.
When CJ and Raja a shoot, face palm and cough.
Paul Millsap and Big Al are the perfect marriage
I hope CJ and Raja get run over by a horse and carriage.
JazzGenius
Banned
Very clever!
Lots of creative Jazz fans on here! I don't know how to quote more than one at a time but I thought Archie Moses' was excellent!
JazzGenius
Banned
Ha Ha Ha - I meant Archie's poem on on an earlier page, not the one above my post.
Grandpa Jazz
Active Member
Omigod-JazzSpazz, Did not see your Casey at the Bat send-off until now. A year and a half after it was posted. See an original thought has never crossed my mind. I like the outcome in mine better though.
Hayward sucks
And Hayward blows
Oh look! Oh look! There Hayward goes
Wide open rims he dismisses
In exchange for Raja misses
And Hayward blows
Oh look! Oh look! There Hayward goes
Wide open rims he dismisses
In exchange for Raja misses
He's ugly, he's slow, he's dumb.
He sends young boys on the run.
He smells like a dumpster that's been soaked in a turd.
The fact that nobody likes him, to him is absurd.
The kind of guy who makes guys bungholes flex
The one, the only, DWillPwnasaurusRex.
p.s. your new name sucks.
p.p.s. Hayward owns your mom.