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Take-Out

Yeah he's a useless flog. I on the other hand am sitting on the floor in my filthy flat, drinking cans waiting for the footy to start, sending lewd messages to my bird and generally being a ****.
mate you're living every blokes dream .. i bow down and worship
 
Uhm, what?

I make pretty good beer (won over 20 awards for it), I cook almost daily and occasionally make really awesome food. Brewing by the 1s and cooking by the 1s is a beautiful approach to use. People sometimes get caught up in the false notion of perfection when it comes to these things, and in that pursuit they lose track of making something good. Brewing and cooking by the 1s is freeing and allows you to be more creative and more intuitive.

I'm good at cooking and good at brewing because I try to develop a deep connection to the ingredients I use. I also realize that almost no one can taste the difference between 6 cloves of garlic and 7 in a large pot of soup. No one can tell you the IBUs (international bittering units) in your beer by tasting it and the recipe software is an estimate based on an estimate based on an assumption.

There's no reason to make quantities difficult. If I use 1 or I use 2 might make a difference. If I use 1 and 1/16th vs 1, no one can taste the difference. It doesn't matter. The experience doesn't change, just my frustration and lack of enjoyment making the food. And when you aren't making food with love and joy, that's something I think people can taste.

So yeah, I cook and I brew by the 1s.

dunno about people tasting the love and joy but i like to think that when i cook for a few specific people they can taste the spite and resentment
 
@Wes Mantooth

This is how I eat my hummus with some rice crackers (crunchmaster that I get from costco). This has been my first break snack for like three years now. I go threw about a quart of hummus a week, buy dried chickpeas in 5lb bags and Lebanese tahini in 32oz jars. Lebanese tahini is the only kind I'll use after trying a dozen or so varieties. I strongly prefer Alkanater Tahini.

iJfaOQf.jpeg


My hummus is pretty strong on the lemon and garlic, well and tahini for that matter. Here's my recipe that is not really like any recipes I find for hummus.

2 cups dried chickpeas, soaked overnight.

1 cup fresh lemon juice (6-7 lemons)

1 cup tahini (Lebanese is best)

1 head of Chinese garlic (doesn't have to be Chinese garlic, but that garlic is MUCH more uniform clove to clove and even more so head to head, plus I think it's a little milder)

3 Tbsp Extra Virgin Olive Oil

2 Tbsp Kosher Salt

1/2 Tbsp cumin

water to add if it needs to be thinned out a little

First soak the chickpeas overnight with approx 1/4 C of baking soda added to the water and mixed in.

Drain the chickpeas, rinse then add enough water to cover plus about 2 inches,

Cook chickpeas in pressure cooker for 10 min at high pressure. Let sit until pressure naturally releases.

Juice lemons until you have 1C juice. Add to large food processor.

Peel the garlic and add to food processor. Run the food processor to chop the garlic in the lemon juice. Let this sit for a minute or two, the lemon juice will help make the garlic less harsh.

Add tahini to the food processor. Run the food processor for at least 2 min. The result should be a soft paste.

Add olive oil, cumin and salt. Incorporate by running the food processor.

Add cooked and drained chickpeas. Make sure they are drained well or your hummus might be too thin. Run food processor for several minutes. Check for texture and consistency. Should be able to hold a peak but should not be so thick it will snap a cracker while trying to eat. If too thick add a little water, run teh food processor a bit and check again. If too thin... ??? add a little tahini, but really just take note and do better next time. You can use a combo of water and olive oil or just olive oil to thin it out if you'd prefer. If it's a bit rough and not too thin add a little olive oil. If it doesn't get better then think about what you did wrong soaking and cooking the chickpeas, may need to cook them longer if you soaked them for at least 8 hours.

This at least doesn’t look like boring, bland *** hummus.
 
Uhm, what?

I make pretty good beer (won over 20 awards for it), I cook almost daily and occasionally make really awesome food. Brewing by the 1s and cooking by the 1s is a beautiful approach to use. People sometimes get caught up in the false notion of perfection when it comes to these things, and in that pursuit they lose track of making something good. Brewing and cooking by the 1s is freeing and allows you to be more creative and more intuitive.

I'm good at cooking and good at brewing because I try to develop a deep connection to the ingredients I use. I also realize that almost no one can taste the difference between 6 cloves of garlic and 7 in a large pot of soup. No one can tell you the IBUs (international bittering units) in your beer by tasting it and the recipe software is an estimate based on an estimate based on an assumption.

There's no reason to make quantities difficult. If I use 1 or I use 2 might make a difference. If I use 1 and 1/16th vs 1, no one can taste the difference. It doesn't matter. The experience doesn't change, just my frustration and lack of enjoyment making the food. And when you aren't making food with love and joy, that's something I think people can taste.

So yeah, I cook and I brew by the 1s.

I literally eyeball everything I make unless I'm baking. When I'm baking, it's ****ing chemistry and I take detailed notes on that ****.

Here's some more food I've made before

This one appears to be non-traditional carbonara.
20181103_151909.jpg
Kimchi Tuna Melt
20181001_203210.jpg

This is Dakgalbi.
20170924_200829.jpg
 
Just a quick PSA:

The Jimmy Johns Chickin Kickin whatever the hell it is... it isn't kicking anything and it is a bland *** sandwich where most of the chicken was basically shredded. Worst sandwich I've had in years.
 
That's pretty cool

Sent from my ONEPLUS A6013 using JazzFanz mobile app
She was pumped. I'm a little jelly because I write MUCH better reviews than she does overall, but she's been better this year (last year) about taking pictures and writing reviews of takeout.

If anyone uses yelp and writes the occasional review I highly encourage you to nominate yourself for elite status, or hit me up and I'll nominate you. They have pretty cool and FREE elite events where you typically get some free schwag and food and sometimes even drinks (there's typically a limit for alcoholic drinks). In 2020 there were only virtual elite events, which isn't quite as cool, but hopefully at some point in 2021 they will start doing these events in person again.
 
I really did mean it that you should apply for Yelp Elite Squad if you participate in Yelp at all. They call it "elite" but they really just want people who agree to the basic rules and actively write reviews (could be for Smith's and the local gas station) to get their "elite" badge because those are more reliably "real" reviews. Once "elite" you can RSVP for elite events. The community coordinator checks you in, or for bigger events there is staff for that, but basically they can verify that for the most part people with the "elite" badge are real people who go out and try stuff.

My favorite event was at Hall Pass in the Gateway. It was Feb. 2020, before any restrictions. We got free samples from every food stall and got 2 free drinks from the main bar and another special drink from the "speak easy" hidden bar. There was a schwag bag and I got a coffee mug that reflected my "YES" (that's Yelp Elite Squad) years of service. They also do a yearly Halloween event that was cool when I did it.

If you apply or get nominated, but they don't think you're quite "there" yet, they will advise you how to get "there." Like for real, they want people to become Yelp Elite Squad. Just use the check-in function, take pictures, write detailed reviews. It can be for pet grooming, gas stations, Wal-Mart, McDonald's, legal services, or the most common thing, restaurants. Then if they pick you, you get free events and schwag at least a few times a year.

 
I really did mean it that you should apply for Yelp Elite Squad if you participate in Yelp at all. They call it "elite" but they really just want people who agree to the basic rules and actively write reviews (could be for Smith's and the local gas station) to get their "elite" badge because those are more reliably "real" reviews. Once "elite" you can RSVP for elite events. The community coordinator checks you in, or for bigger events there is staff for that, but basically they can verify that for the most part people with the "elite" badge are real people who go out and try stuff.

My favorite event was at Hall Pass in the Gateway. It was Feb. 2020, before any restrictions. We got free samples from every food stall and got 2 free drinks from the main bar and another special drink from the "speak easy" hidden bar. There was a schwag bag and I got a coffee mug that reflected my "YES" (that's Yelp Elite Squad) years of service. They also do a yearly Halloween event that was cool when I did it.

If you apply or get nominated, but they don't think you're quite "there" yet, they will advise you how to get "there." Like for real, they want people to become Yelp Elite Squad. Just use the check-in function, take pictures, write detailed reviews. It can be for pet grooming, gas stations, Wal-Mart, McDonald's, legal services, or the most common thing, restaurants. Then if they pick you, you get free events and schwag at least a few times a year.


How many reviews would you say you review a year and for how many years have you been actively reviewing like this? Curious how long it takes to get to elite.
 
How many reviews would you say you review a year and for how many years have you been actively reviewing like this? Curious how long it takes to get to elite.
I've been doing maybe 20-30 reviews a year. I think that's more than enough to become elite. I think it's more important that you write detailed reviews that have some semblance of objectivity. Taking pictures is a big help but not completely essential. I don't think there's a real time limit or anything. Again, Yelp wants as many reviewers to be elite as possible. For one, you're supposed to use your real name and your profile pic has to have your real image in it (not that they have a validity check on that, but you do have to at least say that is true). Another thing is that once someone is elite they are probably MUCH more likely to write reviews regularly, use the check-in functions, take lots of pics, etc..
 
I've been doing maybe 20-30 reviews a year. I think that's more than enough to become elite. I think it's more important that you write detailed reviews that have some semblance of objectivity. Taking pictures is a big help but not completely essential. I don't think there's a real time limit or anything. Again, Yelp wants as many reviewers to be elite as possible. For one, you're supposed to use your real name and your profile pic has to have your real image in it (not that they have a validity check on that, but you do have to at least say that is true). Another thing is that once someone is elite they are probably MUCH more likely to write reviews regularly, use the check-in functions, take lots of pics, etc..

Im all-in with this. **** it. May legit order out now a couple times this week.

What’s your user name? I’d like to read some of you and your wife’s reviews.
 
Really hoping GF’s wife’s username is DirtySlut69 or something.
The funny thing is my wife sometimes uses the username "dirt" or "D-nasty" but part of being elite is using your real name. It is displayed as first name, last initial, but it is supposed to be your real name.
 
I’ve been reading your reviews for the last half hour lol. I am definitely getting takeout a few times this week.
How did you find me?

I remember there being a link I could use to direct people to my reviews but I was just looking for it and couldn't find it.
 
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