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Wife cheated on me... again

I'm 22 with zero ambition to ever get married, my last relationship was 5.5 years and not once thought about marriage and this thread has confirmed my feelings about never getting married.
 
Always a risk telling people what to do with their relationship. And always a risk taking the advice. Sounds like this one worked for the best though.
 
ThaPhunkPhenomenon said:
One thing i can say women never dare chat me. EVER!!
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Batman said:
What's crazy about all this guys is my uncle makes 350,000 dollars a year and was married to my aunt for 21 years and they have 4 kids, youngest is 18, and he is walking away after cheating on her, only having to pay my aunt 15% of his income for 1 year. While in California my stepdad makes 120,000 a year and has to pay half in Alimony and then has to give his ex wife a third of his retirement.


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That's why he needs a good lawyer.
 
You have a lot of life left with or without this woman. Ride the emotional roller coaster, at some point you'll have a clear mind and some mental peace. I wish you the best.
 
Good luck, OP.

I haven't read the whole thread, but a small word of advice.

There was a time in the past that I was pretty much in the worst marriage ever and I vented on here quite a bit. While some community members were great and gave me some sound advice, there is a sub-group of long-time posters on here that are... well... ****heads. Granted, I brought a lot of it on myself with my crazy talk and unstable behavior. But sympathy on a message board is hard to come by without some people feeling like they need to tear you down to bring themselves up because they know they're ridiculous.

Take good advice on here if it makes sense.
Ignore the rest of the crap, and make sure you have a thick skin (which is hard to do when you're emotionally distraught).

Good luck. Infidelity is never fun to deal with.

As an inspirational story... I got divorced about 5 years ago (my choice). I was all done with love and decided not to date ever again. A friend insisted on setting me up on a blind date, and so I went, but that friend was kinda crazy so I had no expectations. Turns out this woman is amazing, and my life is pretty freakin' amazing right now - more so than I ever would have imagined. Not kidding. I'm in a dream scenario right now in a lot of ways.

So life CAN definitely get better. If someone's not the right person, they're not the right person. And you have to look at things holistically. Being able to be faithful is a pretty big deal. I wouldn't say "once a cheater always a cheater" (I know that not to be true from personal experience), but someone changing that type of behavior is pretty hard to do.

Again, good luck.
 
bigb said:
If only judges, lawyers, and law makers could pull their heads out of their asses. I don't expect it to happen to me, but if I get divorced, I'm screwed. Soon to be six kids, wife hasn't worked since my oldest was about two. I would literally be forced to live in my parents basement while 110% of my paycheck went to someone else. My only saving grace might be that I'm now self-employed. I could find ways to hide some income/purchases.
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Yup
 
to the OP .. i can say for sure that a mistake or early life problems that are then dealt with can result in things being healed and happiness. But if as you've said you've been through that phase and she then decided to have an affair for SIX MONTHS !!!!!! because she liked the attention and flattery ... I just don't see a way around that without completely abandoning any sense of self respect. Your wife is either as mentioned a self absorbed narcissist or has some very deep seeded mental / emotional problems and you will be the punching bag/victim if you stay.

My advice would be to maintain your dignity and self respect, don't allow or make excuses for her. You deserve way better.
 
leftyjace said:
Good luck, OP.

I haven't read the whole thread, but a small word of advice.

There was a time in the past that I was pretty much in the worst marriage ever and I vented on here quite a bit. While some community members were great and gave me some sound advice, there is a sub-group of long-time posters on here that are... well... ****heads. Granted, I brought a lot of it on myself with my crazy talk and unstable behavior. But sympathy on a message board is hard to come by without some people feeling like they need to tear you down to bring themselves up because they know they're ridiculous.

Take good advice on here if it makes sense.
Ignore the rest of the crap, and make sure you have a thick skin (which is hard to do when you're emotionally distraught).

Good luck. Infidelity is never fun to deal with.

As an inspirational story... I got divorced about 5 years ago (my choice). I was all done with love and decided not to date ever again. A friend insisted on setting me up on a blind date, and so I went, but that friend was kinda crazy so I had no expectations. Turns out this woman is amazing, and my life is pretty freakin' amazing right now - more so than I ever would have imagined. Not kidding. I'm in a dream scenario right now in a lot of ways.

So life CAN definitely get better. If someone's not the right person, they're not the right person. And you have to look at things holistically. Being able to be faithful is a pretty big deal. I wouldn't say "once a cheater always a cheater" (I know that not to be true from personal experience), but someone changing that type of behavior is pretty hard to do.

Again, good luck.
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Really good post.

Dragon, right?
 
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