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I was thinking that in honor of Father's Day I should tell a bunch of dad jokes today.

Wes Mantooth said:
Your daughter can swim?
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She wears a floaty thing. We go swimming a minimum of once per week. I love the water and am hoping i can make it a passion of hers as well

I did sign her up for "swimming lessons" when she was only 6 months old though.

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addictionary said:
Wow. And here I was thinking 2 years old is too early for my little one. He is crazy about water like me so I guess I should start teaching.
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The swimming lessons taught her nothing at that age but it was fun and we had something to look forward to each Saturday for a few months.

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fishonjazz said:
She wears a floaty thing. We go swimming a minimum of once per week. I love the water and am hoping i can make it a passion of hers as well

I did sign her up for "swimming lessons" when she was only 6 months old though.

Sent from my iPad using JazzFanz mobile app
Click to expand...
Best time to start.
 
Patient: how long do I have doc? Give it to me straight.
Doctor: 10
Patient: 10 what? Months? Years?
Doctor: 9...8...7...
 
In Jamaica a slice of banana pie costs $2.50, in the Bahamas it costs $3.

These are the pie rates of the caribbean.
 
An ancient Babylonian general was once involved in a plot to overthrow the king. His plot included a number of followers in the upper ranks of the army. However, his plot was uncovered, and the king threw him in jail. The king sentenced him to death without a trial.

However, from the jail he was able to secretly contact his followers to arrange to escape, meet his followers, and attack the king's palace at night. So the night before his scheduled execution, the general managed to escape from prison. He fled to a ziggurat several kilometers away, where his followers would meet him. However, the ziggurat was one of several in the area, and he wasn't sure if his cohorts would find the right ziggurat. By this time it was twilight, so he lit a small fire and sent smoke signals to indicate in which structure he was hiding.

However, the king's loyal soldiers saw the smoke coming from the ziggurat, and came to arrest him before he could meet his followers. He was executed later that day.

The moral of the story? WARNING: The searching general has determined that smoking ziggurats can be extremely hazardous to your stealth.
 
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