Oh, I know, for real. Especially if you're a cottam *****.
Post Moronic Things You've Done to Make Me Feel Better About What I Did
- Thread starter Archie Moses
- Start date
Oh, I know, for real. Especially if you're a cottam *****.
//r00t 4 Jazz
Well-Known Member
In High school being a 6' 115-120lb redhead, which = invisible kick my *** sign that a-holes can read. I have a lot of stories that involve somebody or several somebodies trying or wanting to beat me senseless and end with me either me have me joking my way out of it or most of them have me fleeing for my life after I decided to talk **** back.
Summarizing the events, mind you none of these to this day did I start or even know why they came at me: Being chased by cowboys (common theme for me growing up) with baseball bats, running from Polynesian gang members, getting pepper sprayed, sitting at a light only to look up and have a fist flying at me which I was quick enough to duck and have him spit his knuckles on the top of my boney forehead, which he wasn't happy about and a car chase ensued. My favorite and yet a separate car chase that had me going into on coming traffic in downtown SLC on a Sat. night that lasted around 7-8min and me throwing cans of Pepsi denting there nice new'ish lifted truck.
So while I'm not a good story teller and not wanting to get into detail those examples should make you feel much better by example.
Summarizing the events, mind you none of these to this day did I start or even know why they came at me: Being chased by cowboys (common theme for me growing up) with baseball bats, running from Polynesian gang members, getting pepper sprayed, sitting at a light only to look up and have a fist flying at me which I was quick enough to duck and have him spit his knuckles on the top of my boney forehead, which he wasn't happy about and a car chase ensued. My favorite and yet a separate car chase that had me going into on coming traffic in downtown SLC on a Sat. night that lasted around 7-8min and me throwing cans of Pepsi denting there nice new'ish lifted truck.
So while I'm not a good story teller and not wanting to get into detail those examples should make you feel much better by example.
Archie Moses
Well-Known Member
On my mission, there was a guy who tried to rob my companion and I. He pulled a knife on us and asked for our money in front our apartment. I ended up grabbing the knife, tackling him to the ground, punching and elbowing him senseless and then chased him off with his own knife. Win.
The cops came and told me I could keep the knife and to stay away from the guy cause he's dangerous. I still have the knife today.
The cops came and told me I could keep the knife and to stay away from the guy cause he's dangerous. I still have the knife today.
Hell yea. A punk kid (16-18) and three of his friends tried to take a pair of sister missionaries from me (I was their DL). That did no't go down very well for them. I back handed one right across the face knocking him down and threw two more into the dirt. The fourth guy turned into a pansy at that point and backed down. They thought Mormones wouldn't defend themselves.
Plenty of stories that go the other way. Two of my fellow missionaries were robbed at knife point and left beaten and naked in the street.
One guy took a machete to the backpack after he was bent over from a stomach shot. The machete hit his camera which saved his life.
Sister missionaries were assaulted and were going to be raped when some members of the public came forward to save them.
One missionary had all his possessions (clothes, camera, luggage, books, cassete player, pictures...) stolen from his house twice within 4 weeks.
One was hit by a car on purpose (survived, was sent home. for surgery)
Plenty of stories there. I mean it is about 200-400 people that often look drastically different from those around them and they live their for two years. Plenty of chances for bad things to happen.
Didn't you go through Captain Mormerica training? Your suitcase is supposed to be packed full of enough bibles to make a holy book shield.
Not in Central America where you carry a backpack and most people cannot read. You need to be light on your feet and able to move quickly. **** can get serious fast down there.
D
Deleted member 848
Guest
I feel like an absolute ***** when I read these recollections of your guys' stories.
Closest I have ever gotten into a fight was when I confronted three kids after they spat on my car, and then we got in a scuffle until they pulled out these batons on us; we promptly drove away.
I pretty much have zero fight experience.
Closest I have ever gotten into a fight was when I confronted three kids after they spat on my car, and then we got in a scuffle until they pulled out these batons on us; we promptly drove away.
I pretty much have zero fight experience.
Good, fighting is grossly over rated. Better to avoid it if possible.
That sucks. If I was a missionary in Central America I'd go Friar Tuck style by making a cutout inside a bible to hide my taser. I'd also put pompoms on my bicycle handles pull off as a whips (and use them on the sister mish's).
No lie but we did not have bikes. Makes you even more or a target and you would not last the week.
The key is to blend in as much as possible.